Page 82 of Never Have I Ever

“Me trapped in tight confines with the most incredible woman I’ve ever met for hours on end? Yeah, I’m good with this plan.” He opens the door for me, winning bonus charm points. Not that I’m keeping score.

“What happened to the truck?”

He runs around and slides his body into the lower sports car. I’m surprised he fits since his legs are so long. He shuts his door and turns to me. “It’s been a while since I’ve been able to drive the Roma. I wanted to take her out for a spin.” He pulls away and then adds, “And I was hoping to impress you.”

“You impressed me the moment you told me it was tempting to let the bears get me.”

Laird bursts into laughter, the sound saturating the inside of the car and filling my heart. After talking to my mom last night, I went to bed thinking about how quiet it was in my apartment. It wasn’t for lack of sound, though, that’s subdued most nights too. It was lonely without my giant of a loving man.

The space I wanted turned out to be space I didn’t need. The call with my mom made me realize the love I didn’t have is found in him. But more importantly, he’s not said anything about me being gone other than he missed me. This man will give me anything I need, even to his own detriment.

I won’t treat that lightly.

Still chuckling through a heavy breath, he reaches over and holds my hand. “Will you ever forgive me?”

“You were forgiven the moment you stopped to help me when my car broke down.” I shrug with a laugh of my own. “I knew you couldn’t be all bad if you were worried about me.”

He gives my hand a little squeeze before returning it to the steering wheel. “We’ve come a long way, baby.”

“In such a short time, too.”

Bringing my hand to his mouth, he kisses the top and then holds it safely on his lap. “I can’t wait to see what’s ahead for us.”

We’re the same people we were yesterday, even if we have some obstacles to face. Me and my business, how my work takes me away. His career and now this paternity test. I’ll give credit where it’s due; sleep does the body and mind some good. I’ve never been happier than when I’m with him. One of the reasons I texted him last night. “I just want to be with you,” I say, letting my heart lead.

Glancing over at me, he smiles so sincerely that my heart feels bigger, filling a hole in my chest. Between the dreams and the reality I’m living, I’m in so deep that I can’t deny it. And I don’t want to. Like I told Marina, I want this life, this happiness, this commitment with Laird Faris.

He says, “I want to be with you, too.” His brow furrows not in worry but more curiosity. “That must have been quite a night you had. Anything you want to talk about?”

The freeway doesn’t hold my interest, but he does, so I stare at him instead, even shifting my body to get a better gander. “I was overwhelmed. I don’t want to keep my feelings from you. We’re so new—”

“Hmm,” he hums in disapproval, which reaches his expression.

“I told my best friend that I love you.”

The tension between his eyebrows loosens. “Better.”

I laugh and hold his hand tighter, thinking I might never let it go. “I’m not mad about the paternity test.” It’s barely noticed, but I see his gaze harden as he stares ahead. “It happened before me.”

A heavy exhale leaves his chest, leaving me worried I’ve overstepped. “I’m sorry for bringing it up.”

“No,” he replies with a glance. “I want to talk about it. I want you to share your feelings. I saw the weight you were carrying in your thoughts. It showed in your shoulders, and I hate seeing you down.”

“I was exhausted, to be honest. It was the best week of my life, but a lot happened once we got to LA.” I try to pull my hand to fidget with the hem of my shirt, but he holds tighter. I hate that I can’t trouble a thread hanging from the edge and love that he knows I need the support. “I work on my breathing to help with endurance, but also to calm my stress. I practice yoga to help my body find its way back to my previous shape, but most days, I wonder if I’ll ever fully recover. I’m not making excuses; I just want you to know that sometimes I need a little breather. It frustrates me because I wouldn’t last a day with a few of my old clients. I just don’t have patience for that kind of abuse anymore.”

“You should have never put up with it.”

He’s not wrong. “Sometimes we have to do things we don’t like, though.”

“Listen, Poppy. I don’t need to climb mountains, but if you wanted me to, I would for you. But I’m just as happy lying in bed watching bad TV with you. I want to give you what you need. I’ll be honest, my house was busier than it usually is, but what happened yesterday was unexpected.”

“Here’s the thing, though. You deserve time to process the information you were given without anyone’s input, even without mine. I know you love me. Doesn’t matter if it’s been two days or—”

“Nine hundred and twenty-three days.”

Giggling, I say, “Even if it’s been nine hundred and twenty-three days, which is oddly specific, but we’ll go with it. Anyway, whatever time you need, you should have that without worrying about me. I’m going to have my reaction, and that’s part of something I was also processing.”

He says, “If I could change it—”

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