Page 53 of Never Have I Ever

Even in the dark, I can see her eyes widen. “You sound upset.”

“I’m upset at myself. Not you.”

A hint of frustration leaks from her exasperated sigh. “What does that even mean?”

“It means that I want to be with you.”

Her expression softens, her fingertips tapping on my lips, and then they are replaced with a kiss. “You are with me.”

“When we leave.” I can’t believe I’m saying this. I’m not even sure I should. It just feels too good in her presence. She looks at me like I can do no wrong. That’s all I’ve done since I left Austin. Fuck up my life. Poppy is my chance at redemption. “We’re supposed to have days, but I know life doesn’t work that way. So before the distractions and life creeps back in, I’m telling you that I want to see you after Deer Lake.”

“You say it as if Deer Lake is all we have.” Shaking her head, she uses her fingers to doodle across my skin again. “We’ll always have this place, but it’s not all we are.” She slides closer, tangling her legs with mine until I’m holding her tight in my arms. She places one kiss on my shoulder.

I kiss her head.

She kisses higher.

I kiss her forehead.

Our lips meet in the middle.

“Who are we, Poppy?”

“You’re the guy who stopped to help me when my car died.” Her cheek is pressed to my chest, and although she can hear the thunder of my heart, I don’t mind. I want her to know how she makes me feel.

“You’re the woman who got jealous when a server put her hand on me.”

“Ha!” She balks in laughter. “I wasn’t jealous, but her excessive touching was inappropriate.”

A chuckle rocks my shoulders. “Whatever helps you sleep at night, baby.”

“You help me sleep at night.” With her hands stroking my shoulder blades, she kisses my chest.

I kiss the top of her head, wondering how long we’ll be able to remain like this. If it were up to me, it would be forever.

She whispers, “Can I ask you something?”

“Is that the question? The answer is yes.” I grin, seeing her smile in response.

Giggling, she tucks her head still wrapped up neat as a present in my arms. The laughter fades, and silence sneaks in. The quiet doesn’t bother me, though I’d rather not give my thoughts the space to stray. That only leads to second-guessing what’s right in front of me, the gift I’m being given, and if I’m doing the right thing. For her. And not just for me.

It’s not long, maybe a minute max, before she wriggles to give herself room. Tilting back, she rests her head on the pillow as her eyes find mine in the dark. “What do you do for a living?”

The question itself isn’t hard to answer. My career is part of my identity. It’s given me the life I live—the downfalls of fame and the upside of never wanting for anything. It’s only difficult to tell her because it has the potential to change what’s growing between us.

I take a sobering breath and then lean forward to kiss her forehead. With my lips pressed to her sweet and salty skin, I know I can’t hide forever, and I don’t want to. “I’m a musician.” Vague but honest enough to satisfy her?

“Guitarist.” The word is just a breath against my neck, so quiet between us.

I nod, wondering where we go from here as if that one word has broken our spell. I want to see her reaction, to know if she feels differently about me. “Wild guess?”

Fame affects everyone unpredictably, even if only being in proximity. I pray it doesn’t do the same to us.

“Not a wild guess. There’s a photo in the bedroom, and the tattoos gave it away.”

“They usually are.”

“There’s also a guitar in the living room, but it hasn’t been played since you’ve been here.” She grins as if she’s cracked the code. She has.

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