Page 122 of Silver in the Bone

“No,” he moaned again. Cabell tore at his face and hair, his clawed fingers cutting angry red welts over his skin, until it became impossible to tell if the blood on his hands was Caitriona’s or his own. His clothing hung in tatters from the shift.

“It is all right now, lad,” Bedivere said, his voice low and soothing. “It’s done.”

“Cab—”

His head shot up, and the look was so accusatory, so terrible, it stole the breath from me.

Whatever it takes.

Bedivere’s hand came to rest on Cabell’s shoulder, but the touch sparked something. He wrenched himself away and ran through the shuddering clouds of smoke.

I followed, weaving through the wreckage of the battle, gasping for a deep enough breath to fill my lungs. The living moved around me like sleepwalkers, limping toward the tower. Ahead, Cabell disappeared into the stables. I followed.

The animals inside were in a state. The horses kicked at their stalls, unable to see that the threat had passed. Terrorized goats raced around in dizzying circles, bleating with the same animal desperation I’d felt in the courtyard. The sound of Cabell’s ragged breathing led me to an empty stall at the back.

He slid down the wall into a crouch.

“No ... no ... no ...” The word was hysterical, an agonized prayer. I approached slowly from behind. Until I smelled the blood.

He was frantically digging his nails into the cut Emrys had given him, ripping at the skin as dark blood poured down his arm.

“Stop—Cabell!” I dropped to my knees in front of him, trying to pull his injured arm away. He fought me hard enough that I was knocked onto the ground. “Stop!”

“I have to see—I have to see—” He chanted the words, teeth chattering. There was still blood around his mouth and chin.

I scrambled over to him, gripping his blood-slicked wrist again, trying to wedge my body between his arms to block his clawed nails. “You have to see what? What is it?”

When I turned his face toward mine, his eyes were empty. The waves of remorse and pain that had racked his body quieted and he was suddenly still. His eyes deadened, and I knew, I knew without him saying it, that I had witnessed the last light in him gutter out.

“To see if it’s silver,” he whispered hoarsely. “If I’m one of them.”

My heart surged in my chest. I wrapped an arm around his shoulder and pressed my hand against his open wound, trying to hold the skin together. To hold him together.

“No, you’re not,” I said. “I swear, I swear you’re not.”

“I killed her.” It wasn’t a question.

“No, you—” I wanted to protest, but the truth was I didn’t know. I didn’t know what would happen next, or what they might try to do to him, and that was what scared the hell out of me. I didn’t have a weapon to protect him, or the training to. I couldn’t even sneak him out of the tower without drawing him into worse danger.

If the Avalonians believed that the darkness was slowly corrupting all magic on the isle, would they deem Cabell just as tainted as the Children?

Who’s to say he isn’t? came the dark voice at the back of my mind. He’s losing control more and more ...

“Your ankle,” he rasped out, seeing the blood, the bite mark. “I hurt you again ... I ...”

I held him tighter, trying to keep him there, with me. But it didn’t matter. None of it mattered.

“You promised,” he said, agonized. “You promised.”

“We’ll fix this,” I whispered, holding him as he shook. “We’ll fix you, I swear, we’ll fix you.”

“Lass.”

I looked up to find Bedivere watching us. The battle had painted his face in cuts and bruises, but his expression was soft. He tilted his head away, toward the other end of the stables. I resisted, searching Cabell’s face one last time for any sign of emotion amid the bleak nothingness in his eyes. Ripping the bottom of my tunic, I used the strip of fabric to bind the wound on his arm the best I could.

He didn’t react, not even a flinch, as I knotted it tightly where the flesh was coming apart.

“I’ll be right back,” I promised.

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