Page 68 of The Spark

‘And... I got you this, too.’ He removed a book from the deep pocket of his woollen coat and handed it to me. The Lonely Planet guide to Amsterdam. ‘Better gen up,’ he said, catching my eye in a way that only he could, and I knew he got a kick out of making me feel special.

‘I love you.’ Every time I said it, it felt more true.

‘He’s going to propose.’

‘What?’ I laughed. Lara and I were in Frank’s Bar while Jamie played pool with friends. I liked Frank’s and its emporium feel, the cosy jumble of tables, the timber-beamed ceilings and offbeat lampshades, the intimate bohemian vibe. It was somewhere I always felt at home.

‘I’m telling you,’ Lara said, sipping her beer, leaving a thick print of bright pink lipstick on the neck of the bottle. ‘Why else would he suggest a holiday?’

‘To be romantic?’

‘Yeah, and what’s more romantic than a proposal? You’ve been together – what, nearly five years?’

‘Nearly,’ I said – but did all those years count? I did wonder, sometimes. We’d been kids for three of them. It wasn’t like we’d met when we were thirty.

Jamie and I constantly referenced our future, though, saying things like When we’re married, and When we have kids, and Once we’ve got our own place. I guess I kind of took it for granted that we were planning to spend our lives together. But a ring? A proposal? An actual wedding? I hadn’t expected any of those things to be imminent, at least not while we were still studying.

Then again, we’d always been the exception to the norm, hadn’t we? Most people our age hadn’t been in a relationship since they were fifteen. Most of them wouldn’t have wanted to be. That we might be arriving at convention ten years ahead of time felt... unconventional, somehow. So in that sense, really, it suited us.

‘You should think about what you’d say. If he got down on one knee.’

There wasn’t an ounce of hesitation inside me. ‘I’d say yes, obviously.’

‘Definitely?’

‘Definitely.’

‘I’d be happy for you.’

A beat passed. ‘But . . .?’ I prompted.

‘But . . . don’t forget what I said, okay?’

‘About what?’

‘Not making your . . . whole life about Jamie.’

I swallowed. ‘I haven’t forgotten.’

Her blue eyes found mine. ‘Marriage isn’t everything. It’s not... automatic security.’

‘Lara, stop. I know that. Don’t you think I know that better than anyone?’

‘You still need a career, your own money—’

‘I know. This isn’t the 1950s. Look at my mum. I know that.’

‘Good. Just as long as you do.’

I shook my head, changed the subject. ‘What about you and Sam?’ I sipped my pisco sour, enjoying its slightly savage tang. ‘Is it going anywhere, do you think?’ They’d been seeing each other on and off since the summer.

‘Nah. I’m going to let him down gently.’

‘What? Why?’

‘He told me last week he’s considering retraining to be a lawyer.’

‘Oh.’

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