Page 43 of The Spark

‘Will you answer me truthfully?’

And then it happens. The abrupt, mournful wail of an air-raid siren.

I feel cold suddenly, like someone is trickling iced water down the back of my neck.

‘Do you... know what that is?’ I say.

He nods. ‘The high-tide warning. They sound it when the tide turns. To let you know to get to dry ground, or you might get swept out to sea.’

I’ve fully got plans to haunt you, if I go first.

I blink at him. Come on, Jamie. This isn’t funny any more. Stop messing with me.

‘It’s nothing to worry about,’ Ash says, misinterpreting the shift in my expression. ‘We just have to stay on this side of the channel.’

I swallow. ‘Yeah. Right. Okay.’

He gets to his feet, reaches out and pulls me up. Without saying anything further, I slip a hand into his.

I feel sure he’d been going to ask if my attraction to him is down to how much he resembles Jamie. But he doesn’t bring the question up again once we start walking, maybe because he’s not quite ready to hear the answer. And I am thankful, because I’m not sure I can be one hundred per cent honest with him yet. I don’t want him to think I’m mad. I like him so much.

Anyway. Maybe that is all we need to say for now. It’s not the whole story, but it’s a start.

But as we walk, I have to keep glancing over at him, to check whose hand it is I am really holding.

Chapter 20.

It’s late by the time we make it back to Norwich. Despite the rollercoaster in my head, I’ve been aching to kiss him for most of the ride home. For most of the afternoon in fact. As we drove up the coast to Brancaster Staithe. As we stopped at the pub for drinks on the terrace overlooking the salt marsh. As we climbed back into the car, and I felt the air between us contract, my mind turning to thoughts that felt irresistible.

I lean over to him as soon as he’s switched off the ignition. Our mouths meet, and the wild feeling inside me uncoils. He tastes of hunger and sea breeze. Pretty soon his hands are in my hair, and mine are skating down his back, gliding up beneath his T-shirt.

I feel him smile as we kiss, and I do too, because I know what he means.

I push aside all thoughts of Jamie. Because right now, I know it is Ash I want.

After a few minutes, a group of people passes the car, and we draw apart, catching our breath. His eyes dance across my face. He pushes back my hair with one hand. My heartbeat is ridiculous.

‘Neve, can I ask... I like you, a lot, and... I’d like to see if this could go somewhere. But I need to know... are you... looking for something right now?’

I realise, at last, that the answer is yes. I want to do this. I want to make space in my life for this man. ‘I think... I’m looking for you,’ I breathe.

‘Thank God,’ he says, leaning in to kiss me again.

I can’t resist any more. I want him too much. I can ignore the complicating factors. Analysis can wait. ‘Do you want to come in?’

‘Yeah, I really do,’ he says, and then we get out of the car and head inside.

I’d been planning to put on some music, make coffee, freshen up. But as soon as we’re through the front door, I feel his hands on my waist, spinning me gently round so he can kiss me again, and I think, Screw the coffee. I only want you.

We make our way into the living room. I leave the lights off. The house is warm and still. I am molten with anticipation.

I’m not feeling my way now, and neither is Ash. We both want this. He mirrors my movements, letting his fingers skate from the small of my back up to my shoulder blades and then down again, every knot and hollow of my body flexing with his touch.

He lifts my sweater over my head, then takes off his T-shirt. We move towards the sofa, too impatient to make it upstairs. But then I remember Jamie’s framed photographs on the mantelpiece, watching us, and I grab his hand. ‘Come on,’ I whisper.

Upstairs, the bedroom is deliciously dark. He presses me gently to the wall. I can feel his heart pumping like an animal’s. His hand moves to my jeans, unbuttoning then unzipping. I tug myself free, kick them to the floor, and then together we make it onto the bed. I changed the sheets mere hours ago. The scent of fabric softener still lingers. Our bodies are already damp and hot and arching for more, our breathing ragged, our movements primal.

Finally, I move on top of him, feeling desire like I’ve never experienced before.

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