Page 14 of Rev

“Where’s ye da?” His deep, rumbling tone vibrates through me, even though he’s a few feet away.

I know I shouldn’t still feel so attracted to the man who nearly broke me, but hearing his voice does something to me I can’t explain and can’t deny.

“He’s… takin’ some time off,” I tell Hadrian. “I’m running things for now.”

His eyes lock on mine, their colour as alluring as it was all those years ago. I didn’t fall in love with him because of his looks, though. There’s more to the man in front of me than just his outer appearance. He worked for my father, but there was always a gentleness to his rough exterior. It was that side of him that I wanted for myself. He told me I was too young for him, but there was only a handful of years between us. Granted, I was sixteen at the time. But it didn’t matter to me, because I knew what I wanted. Only, he didn’t want me.

“What do ye mean?” There’s a new, Irish twang to his northern accent, and I have to fight the smile that threatens to tilt my lips.

I shrug, turning away from him, and look out at the port that’s busy with people rushing to and fro.

“He’s not been doing well, and I’ve had to step up and take the lead,” I tell Hadrian. “If you need somethin’ then you come to me. If I can’t help, I’ll ask Gordon to deal with it.”

“And who the feck is Gordon?”

I don’t want to tell him anything about what’s happened to my da. When they left, we had a few months of troubles with rival gangs. But when my father hired Gordon as his right-hand man, things got better.

The problem is, I don’t like Gordon, and he doesn’t like me. I know if I were to tell Hadrian everything, he’d more than likely kill the man.

“I’m askin’ ye a question,” he says, his voice deeper now, rougher. There’s a gravel to his words that reminds me of the evening I asked him to kiss me, and he told me no.

Hadrian thought of me as innocent back then, and I guess I was. He wanted to make sure I enjoyed my childhood, as he put it, not look up to a man who killed, maimed, and tortured others for a living. After I started working for my father, though, I saw things that ensured my innocence was nothing more than a lie.

Over the years, I’ve tried to forget Hadrian, but nobody else has ever come close to igniting the same desire that I felt for him.

“Gordon’s my father’s right-hand man, and he’s been helping me run things while Da is healing at home,” I finally bite out.

He leans in closer, surprising me with the scent of his cologne. I remember that smell. It was the one I’d get lost in while trying to keep a clear head around him. I never succeeded.

“What do ye mean?” He cocks his head to the side, looking at me as if I’m speaking another fucking language.

Hadrian wanted me to walk away from this life and leave my father’s business. It’s the one demand of his that I wanted to obey, but I couldn’t abandon the man who raised me. Even though I resented my father for bringing me into his organisation, there was no way out once I was in.

“I’ve had to take over from Da. He’s been…” I shake my head as I think about my father’s health. “He’s been sick for a while now. He developed heart problems a few years ago and eventually he had cardiac surgery. He seemed to be on the mend and ready to take back the organisation, but a few months ago he started to go down hill again, and the doctors aren’t sure why. They keep testing for anything and everything, but they haven’t discovered the cause yet. With my father unwell, I’m the one in charge. So, as I said, if you need something, you can talk to me.”

I turn to walk away, but Hadrian is faster.

His hand swipes out, and grabbing my arm, he swings me around so fast I stumble into his tall, rigid frame. He’s bigger than he was back then. He has more ink, and he still makes those fucking teenage flurries of excitement flutter in my belly.

“Like feck ye’re running this shite,” Hadrian bites out as he pins me with a glare so fierce I’m sure he’s going to kill me. “Where the feck is your old man? I want to speak to him.”

When I go to pull away, his grip tightens, his fingers digging into my flesh, and I can’t help but bite my lip to keep from moaning at the sensations coursing through my body. He doesn’t know anything about me since he left. He doesn’t know I enjoy a bite of pain with my pleasure, and he’s delivering it in spades right now.

“Let me go.” I keep my voice firm, commanding, even though I want nothing more than to sink into his arms and beg him to fuck me.

When Hadrian left, I was a mess, and I told my father how I felt about him. Da was adamant that Hadrian was far too dangerous for me and had done the right thing by leaving. I tried to persuade him that Hadrian was someone who could’ve kept me safe if I needed it. Yes, there was blood on his hands, but he would never have hurt me, not out of anger anyway, but my father didn’t want to listen.

“Harley,” Hadrian murmurs then, his tone softening, and it tugs at every part of my restraint.

I don’t want to care about him. I certainly can’t allow him to see what he’s doing to me, so I pull against his hold. He releases me, and the last remnants of my stupid teenage heart break once more.

“There is nothing here for you, Hadrian.” I turn and start to walk away.

I don’t make it far before I hear him say, “There’s always been something here for me, Magpie.” The words he utters sink into my psyche, into my chest, and they attack my heart with a vengeance.

My feet cease to move, and I flick my gaze over my shoulder. He’s watching me, like he always used to. No matter how many times he told me he wasn’t right for me, I never believed him. I could see in his eyes what he felt for me. And when he walked away, I wanted so badly to hate him, but I never could bring myself to feel anything but love. Now everything is different, and there’s no room for him in my life—or my heart.

So, I reply, “Not anymore.”