Page 61 of Motorycle Daddies

I force myself up off the floor and go to shared kitchen in my dormitory. I’ll have a cup of ginger green tea first, to calm my stomach, and then I’ll head to the nearest convenience store. I’ll have to make sure to buy some junk food and maybe some gum. That way it doesn’t look like I’ve gone for something suspicious. I don’t know how much attention my guards will pay to my purchases, and I don’t want Mikey to go spread rumors with Dart when they see each other again.

It takes me about an hour to be ready to go, and I’m fighting nausea still on the way there. But I think this nausea is about nervousness. What is everyone going to think?

I can’t have that line of thinking. One moment at a time.

I go and pick out some wintergreen gum, a bag of chips, some ice cream, and I get a beer for both of my guards. Maybe a good present will keep them hushed. Then, I grab the dreaded pack of three pregnancy tests. Just to be sure.

I feel so weird as I go to check all these things out, and I’m glad my guards wait outside on their bikes instead of coming inside with me. I shove everything down into the bag so they can’t see everything I have and head back out, offering them the beers.

I give them the beers once we get back to my dorm, and they sit down on the steps of the building and get to shooting the shit. Good, that means they’ll leave me alone for a bit.

I pee on the sticks and set them across the bathroom counter before starting a ten-minute timer on my phone. I tap my knee as I sit there and wait for the answer. Though, I know in my bones what the answer is going to be. And it’s going to change so many things in a way that I never wanted.

Sure enough, as the timer goes off and I slowly look at them, they all say positive.

I’m pregnant. And I don’t know how I’m going to tell anyone.

33

MEREDITH

Ifeel more like a little kid than a woman at her OB/GYN’s office with my legs dangling over the exam table. The doctor insisted that they confirm the pregnancy with a test in the office. I guess it’s standard procedure or something, but I made it clear that I took three pregnancy tests to be sure. Add that to the constant queasiness and my sudden aversion to food I used to love, and it’s pretty obvious. But I have to let the doctor do the job they were paid to do if I’m going to get what I need.

I need someone to tell me about my options, and someone to tell me what to do to take care of my body. I wasn’t exactly expecting this. I went from being a virgin to being kidnapped to being a girl with three boyfriends so quickly.

Maybe I should’ve been more prepared for moments like this. But I just wasn’t. I’ve always been too busy taking care of my father, making sure he’s okay. I’ve been too busy being a good girl and making good grades.

I guess I don’t do things halfway.

It’s a terrible joke. And probably not the time for it.

This is the first appointment I could get. I’ve been holding off the guys as much as I can, but they’re making me come back to the clubhouse tonight. They said they would pack me up themselves and throw me over their shoulders if they had to.

They’re worried because they haven’t heard anything. It’s been radio silence. And with the Bratva, that usually means that something is stirring under the surface. Something big, and they don’t want me caught up in it.

The only problem is, I’ve just got news that I failed my science exam. That was the last I took, the one where I was so sick and so tired. I’m not too surprised, but it’s frustrating. It means I have to retake it a couple days before the next semester starts, so my winter break is not going to be as fun as I had hoped.

Plus all the pregnancy hormones. I don’t know how to hide this for long, but there are so many things to think about. I have to focus on school and studying. With all of the hard work I’ve been doing in order to make sure I had the opportunity to go to college, I can’t just drop out. I have to keep up with my studies.

Not to mention that I have to think about the guys. I don’t know if Dart, Grizzly, or Trap even would want a baby. The three of them are getting up there in years, especially Grizzly. And he already has a full-grown daughter. I don’t know if he’d want to raise another child. I know Harlow’s guys handle it so well, but not all men are the same, even in the same MC. My situation won’t necessarily turn out as well as hers did.

There are too many unanswered questions here. And I’m not ready to answer a single one, much less tell Harlow like we had planned. That’s what I’m supposed to be doing this week. All the guys expect me to come to them with an idea of how to do it, but I haven’t had a single chance to think about it. I’ve been too worried about being pregnant.

The thing is, if I start to show or become obvious, I’ll have way too many people as my enemies. What would Harlow say if I was pregnant by her father and I didn’t even tell her we were together?

I can’t let this go on, but all of the energy keeps being zapped out of me as a child is growing inside of me.

There’s a knock at the office door, just a courtesy, and the doctor comes in. She’s a woman with wrinkles that tell me she’s at least forty if not older, with a full head of beautiful black hair. She has a stern look on her face, but not unfriendly.

“It does indeed look like you’re pregnant. Would you like a prescription for prenatal vitamins?”

I nod. “Honestly, I don’t know what I’m doing. This was kind of…unexpected.”

I look away when I say it, feeling embarrassed. I’m young, but I’m a grown woman. Her stern gaze makes me feel irresponsible.

She nods, no hint of judgment on her face. To tell the truth, she probably sees this more often than not. It can happen to anyone. “That’s okay. We can go over what to do. We can even go over options if that’s what you need to know. Are you worried about STDs? We could test for those as well today if needed.”

The question shocks me and it takes me a moment to process.

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