Page 81 of Motorycle Daddies

“Do you think I’m really only upset about the baby?”

“I don’t know, you aren’t talking to me. You’re making me guess. How am I supposed to know what’s going through that brain of yours?”

“Our job is to protect you.” He seems exasperated, like he can’t emphasize enough the glaring point I’m missing in all of this. “We didn’t do that. Now you’re even more vulnerable. How am I supposed to keep you safe? How are we going to keep this baby safe? You were attacked and none of us were there.”

The doctor knocks on the door and walks in clutching a clipboard. He bobs his head toward everyone to greet us and stands on the opposite side of the bed as Trap. Trap crosses his arms, falling back into his worried state as if a dark cloud has once again enveloped him.

The doctor lingers on the notes on his clipboard for a few seconds before glancing at the machines and finally landing his gaze on me. Everyone from the corner of the room inches closer again to see what the doctor might have to say.

“So, Nurse Shay was in here just before and it seems you’re doing well overall.”

“Do you think she’s good to go home?” Dart asks.

“With a head trauma like this and her most recent scan, I’m suggesting she stay one more night for observation. There’s a limit on guests, but that couch does pull out if anyone prefers to stay.”

“Of course,” Grizzly answers. “Someone will be here.”

“You mentioned the most recent brain scan…did you see something?” Dart asks.

“Some minor swelling, but we don’t want to see that worsen. We’ll take one more scan tomorrow to ensure things are looking good and go from there. But if you’ll excuse me, I have more rounds. Please take care, Meredith, and I’ll see you tomorrow. Get plenty of rest, okay?”

As the doctor leaves, Harlow stiffens and glares at Grizzly. “Where exactly is home going to be right now? Do you plan on taking her back to her dorm? It must be awkward having someone so much older hanging around all those college kids.”

“Harlow…” Grizzly says.

I want to cut the tension, so I chime in with my somewhat fake sense of confusion to try and get things on the right track.

“I know you want to help as Harlow’s dad. You’ve always been like another father to me. God knows a better one than my own. But I don’t need you or anyone else coming back to the dorm with me. I’ll be fine. I don’t want to make Harlow uncomfortable with anything.”

“Meredith,” Harlow snaps. “Look at my father and tell him you don’t see him as anything more than my father.”

I look into Grizzly’s eyes, and they look pained as he awaits the denial of my feelings to come out of my mouth. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. I look at his handsome face, so mature, and eyes that see right through me to the girl inside who always wanted to be protected.

“See,” Harlow says, looking back and forth between the two of us. “I knew she couldn’t do it. You can cut the act. We all know you have a terrible poker face.”

“I’m sorry,” I say. “I just don’t want the two of you fighting and at odds because of me. I should have come clean about everything a long time ago.”

“It’s my fault,” Grizzly blurts out. “I let my professional side interfere with my personal life. I never expected to feel anything for anyone ever again after losing your mom. I wasn’t looking for anyone, let alone a friend of yours. I didn’t stop to think long and hard enough about how you might feel, and by the time I did it was too late. I was already in too deep.”

He sighs, meeting his daughter’s eyes. “I’ve beat myself up for a long time wondering what your mother would want. Would she want me to move forward at all? Who would that person be? What would they look like, what would they be like?”

He moves his eyes to me, and even though I’m sure I look a mess, exhausted and bruised, he looks at me like I’m the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen.

“And?” Harlow asks.

“And at some point, I realized I had to stop getting so specific and expecting it to be perfect. She would just want me to be happy. And look, I know this is a lot to take in, and I know it freaks you out. But I really hope that as someone who knows so much love, you’ll be happy for me too.”

Dart’s phone rings and he walks to the window to take the call.

“Holy shit…you sure?” he says, and we all look at him, waiting to hear what’s being said on the other side of the phone. He puts his arm on the wall and glances back toward us. His jaw is clenched, and he shakes his head in either direction.

I’m getting anxious the longer he listens to the caller in silence, and I even have a little bit of a headache. I’m not sure if that’s from the head injury, dehydration, or the stress of all the arguing and conversations I’ve been having trying to smooth things over with everybody.

“How much?” Dart asks. “Wow, damn…and you’re completely sure this information is accurate? Alright…alright…I’ll let them know.” Dart smashes the phone down on the windowsill and closes his eyes.

“What is it, Dart?” Grizzly asks. “It sounds serious.”

“It is,” Dart confirms.

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