Page 92 of Self Studies

He scrubbed his hand through his long thick hair, frizzing it. “Would you be willing to fucking walk with me? Please?”

I swallowed, glancing at the blue sky through the window. I looked at Roisin’s tight lips. Her gaze burned into me, letting me know if I didn’t go, she wasn’t chilling in the room with me while I indulged in more self-pity. I wasn’t getting anything else out of her.

I didn’t look at the man. “I want to walk the barrier. If I don’t want to talk, I don’t have to.”

The man relaxed slightly. “Shit yes, deal.”

I let out an annoyed breath. “Give me five minutes.”

Roisin closed the door in his face.

It took me more than five minutes to clean up a bit and straighten my uniform. Taking a deep breath, I studied my short hair with the Viking braids in the mirror. The petite black piercing at the top of my ear made me look so much tougher than I felt.

I swallowed. I’d lived, and I wanted more. I wanted real freedom. Not from the MA, but from my fears which almost dragged me into my old life. I needed to learn control, but I’d become almost desperate to use my magic over the last three days. Twice I’d used it before the clasps, and, right or wrong, it belonged to me. I wasn’t a vessel. Like Professor Garnet said, I was something more. I wanted to learn who that person was and love her.

I opened my door. The man stood across the hall. Shoulders back with his legs slightly parted, his confident posture looked painfully ridged. His skinny white tie dangled comically across his built chest. I remembered my face pressed into that same chest after coming out of the suitcase. Heat filled my cheeks. I itched to hide in my hood, but the garment sat in pieces wherever the Institute took its trash.

I closed the door behind me and moved to the middle of the hall. “So, what’s your name?”

He stepped forward, joining me, and held out his hand. “Marcus Ashe.”

My gaze drifted to the floor, and I forced it up. Slowly, I took his hand and held his gray unrimmed eyes.

“My friends call me Ashe,” he added.

We released our grips.

“My friends call me A.” I paused. After a moment, I added. “Or at least, they will be starting today. Thank you for saving my life.”

An almost shy smile twitched Ashe’s lips up. He didn’t fidget like Beryl. He didn’t judge me like Saffron. His eyes weren’t full of the admiration I’d come to find in Professor Garnet’s gaze. He was another student, lost like I’d been when I first arrived. I fingered my clasps. He would keep me safe. I could feel it.

Slowly, I guided him out of the building and toward the wall that kept the Institute separated from the world.

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