Page 36 of Toxic Wishes

“Do you have security, Mom? Knowing that Dad could wake up any day and say he’s fallen in love with another woman since you let him roam free with no consequences?” I knew my comment wasn't subtle in any way, but her whole thinking process pissed me off.

Why doesn’t she fight? Why doesn’t she believe in herself more?

“That’s not true. Do you think that house we moved into two years ago was his call?” She wipes her hands on the dish towel. “Please, he knew it would be his balls on the chopping block if he didn’t comply, not after being married for twenty years.”

Dad is a good-looking guy who makes great money, and my mom had her dream house, which she had always wanted, with a pool in the backyard and a hot tub. So, I can’t deny that my dad was a great provider and would give my mom anything when it came to material things, but is all that stuff worth giving up your peace of mind? Your sanity? Your self-worth?

“Besides, that’s what marriage is for.”

“To trap the guy?” Adalee says as she holds a veggie stick to Aria’s mouth.

“No, to ensure you have security, and make no mistake, marriage makes it harder to leave. Why do you think your Aunt Martha pestered Troy? And your dad knows I would get half of everything, and that kills him more than having some ass on the side.”

I breathe deeply as I try to wrap my head around my mom's logic. Can she even hear herself? My grandma taught my mom and aunt to get married and have kids, and as long as the man provided, the woman just needed to keep her mouth closed and look pretty doing it.

I loved my grandma and will always respect her because she’s the only one who ever acted like she gave a damn about me growing up, but what she taught all the women in the family was a curse.

All my cousins and my sister were drop-dead gorgeous, so it was easy for them to pursue that dream. I, on the other hand, with my tight curls, round face, and big eyes, made it damn near impossible for that to be my reality.

“Again, I think what Abigail is doing is wise. I’ve only been married to Ahad for two years, and it’s already tiring having him control all the money and see what I spend, but when it comes to him, he can do what he wants, spend what he wants, and I can’t say anything.”

“Well, that’s also because he’s foreign, honey. They are known to be control freaks, especially in terms of finances. It's a trade-off, though. You get to stay home and enjoy this beautiful baby.” She grabs Aria's little hand and wiggles it gently “You’re not out there hustling like some women. It’s not a bad thing what you got going. Count your blessings, Adalee. You could be under stress like Abigail.” Adalee eyes me, giving me a sympathetic look, but I force a small smile, letting her know I’m not even offended. Not after all these years.

“And like I’ve always told you girls, it could be worse. Be grateful, Adalee. You have a beautiful home and can go shopping anytime you want.” My mom places a few veggies and chips on her plate, along with half a turkey sandwich from the food displayed across the large kitchen island.

Ahad’s dad owned a bunch of rental property, and his dad was married to a wealthy woman who died a few years back, which I still think is a mystery. Especially since he inherited a 11 million, which he used to invest in real estate, and opened a little Greek restaurant to help bring in more cash flow. He may be a shallow, narcissistic asshole, but he was a great businessman. He’s gotten nicer to me over the years, too. I wasn’t sure if it was because deep down he respected me or he was not as energetic due to being a husband and new father now.

My mom’s phone rings, and I know it’s my dad. She had no friends, so he was the only person ever calling her. It’s been only one day, and I want to return to California. I wouldn’t dare ask to stay with my sister, nor could I study with a baby once I was back in school, so that idea was out.

“No, Micheal, that was the other credit card.”

I hear my dad yell through the phone.

“Don’t get mad at me. I’m not the one who canceled the other credit card. I had to open a new one. How else was I going to get groceries or buy my granddaughter anything? Plus, I had to get a gift for Jenna’s baby shower.”

I hear him say get a fucking job, along with some more bantering.

This is why I would never marry a guy just for money or how the women in my family like to put it, be taken care of. No matter how generous the guy is or how in love you two are when you get married, everyone can feel used if the relationship is unequal. I did study biology, and to be honest, women have to pull their weight just as much as men. It’s not enough to just be pretty and think that will satisfy a man over time.

That’s what I told myself anyway. Maybe a part of me said that to myself because relying on my looks wasn’t an option.

Adalee walks off to the living room with aria. I start to follow her lead, but I need to use the restroom before going back into that torture dungeon with all the chatty girls.

I wash my hands, dry them on a towel, and avoid the mirror as I open the door. When I take a step, I’m faced with a hard chest.

“Excuse me,” I say, looking up at the big, muscular guy. “Troy, congratulations,” I say, recognizing him from the photos on Jenna’s Facebook.

“Hey, you must be the little cuz,” he brings me in for a hug with his thick, cut arms.

“Yup, that’s me,” I say, trying to breathe in his gorilla grip. He releases me and eyes me up and down.

“You are shorter in person than your pictures give off on Facebook.” A wide smile spreads across his face, revealing his perfectly white teeth against his brown complexion. “Little shorty. I like it. Were you a cheerleader growing up? Because you are the perfect size for one.”

Gross. It hasn’t even been one minute before he's making sexual innuendo that’s related to football.

“No, orchestra. Violin to be exact. Being a nerd was my hobby.”

He chuckles lightly “Nice, little geeky chic; the quiet ones are always the freakiest ones,” he says, placing a hand on my shoulder.