Page 77 of Toxic Wishes

I look over at her face, and it’s beaming as she takes in the flowers, lights, and fancy decorations the pastor sits under.

She’s mesmerized.

I’m glad Troy joined the Arizona Cardinals. We’ve become good friends, but sometimes I wish he was single like me so I didn’t feel obligated to attend these events where Jenna’s cousins would always be at. Naomi was semi-obsessed with me, which I thought was hot at first, but now, I find it almost irritating in a pathetic sense.

“Ya, gorgeous,” I say through a clenched jaw. Namoi was doing that thing where she ignored the energy in the room and acted like everything was perfect even when it wasn’t. She lived for perfection.

Namoi wanted a perfect life with an ideal husband. She always told me how perfect I was. But the truth was, I was far from perfect, but she never really dug deep to try and get to know me in that way. Half the time, I felt we were long-distance friends rather than boyfriend and girlfriend. She hated opening up about anything. Hell, I don’t think I even saw her cry, not even when her Dad died.

“I still don’t know why she didn’t want bridesmaids,” she glances at me gristly. “ I mean, we grew up with each other. How are we not supposed to be offended by that?”

“Maybe because she just didn’t want to have any,” I say, shrugging my shoulders.

“Well, that’s selfish.”

I stare at her. “No, it’s not, it’s her wedding. Besides, she's pregnant. She doesn’t want to look fat compared to all her friends and family on her wedding day.”

She scoffs as she folds her arms over her chest. “I guess.”

I’m thankful when the music starts playing, and Naomi is forced to shut up. Mental note to self: Talk to as many girls as you can tonight, and don’t stay in one spot too long so Namoi can’t linger. Thank God there is alcohol at this wedding.

After the ceremony, I decided to follow my plan and mingle. “I bet you eat plenty of protein.” Some tall chic says, and I fake laugh for the hundredth time tonight. It’s been an hour after the ceremony, and I felt like I was on the field playing football as much as I was moving around. Hors d'oeuvres were being passed along with champagne, so I tried to introduce myself. I’m almost glad Jenna didn’t allow children at the wedding. I know Bodie would be bored out of his mind now.

I’ve called my mom twice to check up on him, and Bodie has been doing fine. She made him dinner, of course, and then they played a card game and fed the horses. They are now eating ice cream and watching a movie, A Pet's Life, one of Bodie's favorites, and winding down for the evening.

“Well, when you train 52 weeks a year, you got to get your protein in.”

The ladies chuckle as I take another sip of my champagne. I didn’t want to get drunk since I was driving, but the champagne wasn’t cutting it. I need something more robust.

“If you’d, ladies, excuse me. I’ll be right back.”

“Don’t go too far.” One of the women shouts as I walk off.

I head straight for the bar. Tents covered the whole reception, with a dance floor in the middle and two stations where the bars were set up. Troy and Jenna have been taking pictures for about an hour now, along with their families, and I told myself I would leave shortly after they cut the cake. My mom offered to let Bodie stay the night so I could enjoy myself, but I was used to a routine, so having a curfew for myself, even at this age, didn’t bother me. Plus, it gave me an excuse to leave early. Even though Jenna was pregnant, Troy told me they rented this venue until one in the morning. He wanted to party it up, and I couldn’t blame him. Not only is he a married man now, but he’ll be a dad soon, and he has no idea what he has in store for him. Kids are blessings, don’t get me wrong, but they are the most demanding creatures on this planet. It’s why Bodies’ mom couldn’t handle being a mom. She was too selfish and had the patience of a two-year-old toddler.

“Hey, man,” Josh slaps a hand on my shoulder as he comes up behind me. “Been looking for you. Cool wedding, huh?”

“Ya, it’s beautiful,” I say as I scan the tall trees and picturesque mountains behind the chapel. The sun was setting now, making it more breathtaking as the little fireflies and stars blended in with the LED lights on top of all the white tents outside.

“So many damn pictures, though. Thank God I shaved.” Josh says, rubbing his chin. Even though Josh was twenty-two, he still looked twelve to me.

I laughed lightly. There were at least two hundred people here, but when you invited your whole NFL team and had only pro-athlete friends, you can bet plenty of pictures would be taken.

“I wanted to thank you for picking up Abigail. I’m already feeling buzzed,” he says in a sing-song tone, which annoyed me because it reminded me just how different we are regarding maturity.

“Ya, it was no problem,” I told him.

“I just knew there would be plenty of hot chicks tonight so that I couldn’t miss the golden opportunities floating around me, ya know what I mean.” He nudges my shoulder, but I don’t budge. I’m at least four inches taller than Josh and had an extra fifty pounds of muscle. “And it’s summer. I got to get my groove on.” He sways his hips back and forth. I give him a stoic expression.

“Oh, man, I saw you chumming it up with the ladies tonight. Lots of different ones, too. Tryin' to go for that Menage-trois, perhaps? Huh, huh?” He smirks, and the twinkle in his eyes tells me he is well on his way to a drunken stooper.

I have no intention of taking any girl home. Especially Namoi. I have been living back and forth from Arizona and here. I’ve had my fair share of enjoying the perks of being a pro football player and crazy sex in a state that’s not very far from Las Vegas. I lost count even of how many girls I’ve slept with since being an NFL player.

Honestly, sex became a drug, an addiction to the point it wasn’t even fun anymore. It’s part of why I wanted to take a break from Naomi. Although I slowed down a lot when I met her, my mind was still warped from all that sex. That’s the thing about this business,we are praised and glorified, but no one sees the inner turmoil we struggle with when being thrown all this attention and money. It’s why I consciously read a book one of my coaches told me about. Rich Dad, Poor Dad. It changed the way I thought about money and my father altogether. Not that I had him on a high pedestal, to begin with.

“No, I plan to go home after Jenna and Troy cut the cake.”

“Really? You’re kid-free, man. Live it up!” He throws his hands up the air.

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