Page 129 of Commit

Abbot had the toughest time of all of us. It took him a while to recover. But once he did, he told us what had happened.

Initially, he had gone to see Mark—the guy he liked. But Mark turned him away, saying he needed someone with less baggage. Good riddance, I say. The fucker didn’t deserve him anyway.

It was around that time that Lewis contacted him to apologize. He told Abbot how his father had caught him kissing another guy and beat the shit out of him and kicked him out of the house. He wasn’t allowed back until he “fixed” himself. Lewis took his anger out on the wrong person. But he manned up in the end, apologizing, and then dropping everything to be by Abbot’s side while he was in the hospital and afterward during his recovery. They’ve been inseparable ever since.

“He doesn’t care that I’m gay.”

“Who, Hayden? Why would he? I told you before that your biggest enemy was you. He still feels awful that while he was cursing your name, you were tied up somewhere.”

I grit my teeth. We don’t talk much about Landon. It was heartbreaking for Abbot to realize that the brother he looked up to wasn’t who he thought he was.

“I know, and I milk it for all it’s worth,” he jokes. “Don’t look now, but your husband’s coming over.”

“He just can’t help himself,” I sigh.

“He loves you. I get it now. I think I even got it then. All that matters to me is that you’re happy.”

“I am. I really am.”

“Good.” He kisses my temple as Hudson stomps up to us.

“Keep your lips to yourself, kid.”

He tugs me from Abbot’s arms and pulls me into his, making Abbot laugh.

“I think my boyfriend would be heartbroken if I did that.”

“Well then, just keep your lips for him,” he grumbles. “How’s school going? Do you need anything?”

Abbot shakes his head and tries to get to his feet. Hudson offers him a hand and helps him up. Abbot’s leg was fucked for a while, and even though it’s mostly healed now, it’s weaker than it was before.

“We’re good. I love sharing a house off-campus with Hayden and now Lewis. Thanks for paying for that, by the way.”

“Don’t mention it. I should have known Lewis would transfer to Arizona to be with you. The boy has it bad.” Hudson sighs before clearing his throat. “Is he good to you?”

Abbot swallows hard. “Yeah, Dad, he’s really good to me.”

Hudson slaps him on the back. “Good. But it wouldn’t hurt to remind him that I have access to a plane and a gun.” He turns to me, kisses my forehead, and walks away. Abbot’s eyes follow him as he disappears into the house.

They might not ever have a real father-son relationship, but they’re trying. And that’s all that matters to me.

“How’s school going for you?”

“Don’t ever tell your dad I said this, but I think I prefer doing it online. It means I can volunteer at the center. I do a girls-only class now with Kate and a few others who have similar experiences to mine. It’s hard, but I feel like I’m making a real difference.”

“I’m happy for you. I always knew you were going to save the world, one lost soul at a time.”

“Okay, everyone, food’s ready!” Ivy shouts. I look over and see her and Trix laying the last trays of food on the huge patio table.

Everyone descends on it like starving animals. I stand back and watch this strange, makeshift family of mine. I think about what Abbot said and can’t help but smile.

I’m not out to save the world. I’m just trying to find my place in it. And standing here right now, surrounded by all the people I care about, I think I’ve found it.

“Come on, Birdie, time to eat.”

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