Page 85 of Forbidden Lyrics

“Wait.”

Jaw tight, he keeps his feet planted and looks down at me. “We’re good, Dovey.”

“No, we’re not. I’m sorry, Fen. Seriously. I’m not one who lashes out. Not usually. That was uncalled for. Obviously, I care what your brother likes and hates because he’s turned me into an insane person who questions every single thing she says or does in hopes of catching his attention, and I didn’t want to admit that very pathetic truth out loud, so I lashed out––”

“You don’t have to explain––”

“After the party, we…had a moment,” I blurt out, revealing my secret in exchange for the one I rubbed his nose in. “And even though I asked for it, and I pretended that it wouldn’t mean anything to me, he got a text from his ex right after, and it hurt. That’s what happened. That’s why I don’t know what to do or how to feel or if going on tour with him is a good idea. It has nothing to do with you and everything to do with me and my own insecurities. I’m a mess, Fen.”

With his head cocked, he studies me carefully. Like he thinks I’m delusional but doesn’t want to offend me.

“Which ex, Dovey?”

The fact that there’s more than one makes me want to puke, but I whisper, “Em.”

“He’s still texting Em?” Fen demands, his brows reaching for his hairline.

I nod, nearly choking on the constant lump in the back of my throat that manages to sneak up on me anytime I think of Gibbs or that stupid text that haunts me like a freaking nightmare.

What did it say?

Was he going to meet up with her or something?

And why do I even care?

Scrubbing his hand over his face, Fen curses under his breath, then stares back at me for a few seconds as if at war with himself.

“What is it, Fen?”

“Em was toxic. She wasn’t a bad person, but she definitely knew how to mess with a guy’s head, I guess. But you don’t have to worry about Sonny. Not where Em’s concerned.”

“And why’s that?”

“Because he was in it for the sex. Milo’s the one who fell for her.”

“If that was true, Gibson wouldn’t be texting her anymore,” I argue.

“Trust me, Dovey. If Sonny was texting her, there’s a reason, and it isn’t because he’s interested in hooking up again.”

A spark of hope flashes inside of me, but I try to rein it in. “H-how do you know?”

“Because he’s been too into the new girl at his work.”

And just like that, the hope fizzles out again. Blinking back tears, I shake my head. “I don’t know how true that is. Especially now that he’s gotten what he wanted.”

Fen lifts his chin, his gaze darting over to something behind me before quickly returning to me. “Wanna bet?”

“Hey, Dove,” Gibson murmurs behind me. My eyes widen in shock, and I straighten my spine, but my reaction fans Fender’s amusement.

“Hey, Sonny,” he answers for me. “Dove and I were chatting about the tour.”

“You’re still going?” Gibbs asks, his question directed at me even though I’ve refused to look at him. I’m not sure I can. But I don’t want to be a coward, either. And I don’t want him to see how much he’s affected me. How much he’s hurt me.

I swallow thickly, forcing myself to face him, though I keep my gaze glued to the ground.

Baby steps.

“I was thinking about it,” I admit, my voice nothing but a whisper.