Page 38 of Saved By the Firefighter

Hell, maybe it’s time to move out of this place. Charlotte likes the ranch better anyway, and we can make the longer commute work one way or another. She’s staying with Mia and Elijah this weekend, and I worry when she gets back Monday she’ll want to see Ellie. She’ll invite Ellie to dinner and hang out with her outside of school. I know my sweetheart wants Ellie to be a mother figure but that’s unfair to Ellie, especially since I can’t get my head and heart right.

That scare with Marcus coming to the ranch was a wake up call. I’ve been playing with fire too long. Even if I have feelings for Ellie, acting on them will ruin relationships.

I think I will look into moving, as much as it hurts to close this chapter with Ellie.

A knock startles me from my thoughts. For a second, I consider ignoring it, but duty or maybe curiosity nudges me to answer. I yank open the door and there she is—Ellie Carter. Of course it's her. My heart flips as my eyes can’t help but scan the simple jeans and sweater she’s wearing. This woman looks beautiful in everything.

Jesus, this is déjà vu. The day she moved in next door, she showed up with a casserole too, all bubbly laughter and sass. The memory slams into me with unexpected force; her smile, that cute glint in her eye had me hooked without even knowing it. Now her eyes are wary, searching my face for a reaction.

I swallow hard, fighting the surge of longing her presence brings. "Hey." My voice comes out gruffer than intended.

Ellie's smile falters for a second before she recovers. "Hey yourself. I, uh, wanted to drop this off. You know, just a neighborly hello."

I stare at the casserole like it's a ticking bomb. Part of me wants to retreat, the other part is already picturing us on the couch together, her head on my shoulder.

Get a grip. I ended things for a reason.

Still, I step aside. "Come in."

She passes by me, the faint scent of her perfume—jasmine, I think—nearly undoes my resolve. As I close the door behind us, I admit to myself, if to no one else, how much I've missed her these past few weeks.

The best part of my days? Those afternoons I managed to sneak off work early, picking up Charlotte from her tutoring sessions. It’s those moments, catching sight of Ellie, that have kept me going. Seeing her now, standing in my half-unpacked living room, stirs a desire I keep trying to bury.

I clear my throat, watching her set the casserole on the kitchen counter. "You didn't have to do that."

"Found myself making too much again," she says.

I doubt that, but I just tell her, “Thanks.”

Ellie fusses with the dish, avoiding my gaze. "I just thought...Well, it seemed like a good excuse to stop by. See how you're settling back in. Everything in my apartment seems to be repaired, so I hope they got everything in yours, too."

I nod and fold my arms, leaning against the counter. The quicker we get this over with, the better. Because the longer she stays, the quicker my resolve will crack. "How's work? Your class?"

"Good, good." Her fingers twist around each other. "Busy. The kids are gearing up for the science fair. And you?”

"Always something new," I say, though my mind isn’t on work. Ellie's fidgeting with the hem of her sweater, a telltale sign she’s got more on her mind than this small talk.

We lapse into silence. Ellie bites her lip. She's working up her courage to say something—probably about us. About her feelings. The ones I can't reciprocate, no matter how much I might want to.

"Jake, I—"

"Don't." I cut her off, unable to bear hearing her confession. The pain in her eyes makes me feel like the lowest bastard on earth. I lower my gaze. I’m not trying to hurt her; I just don’t know if we should get into this kind of conversation. I’m feeling too weak today.

"Please, just listen." Her voice wavers. "I know you think this is a bad idea. That we'll end up hurting each other, or that Marcus will never forgive us. I admit that us being together has the potential to be messy at first…” Ellie takes a shaky breath, inching closer. "I'm tired of pretending I don't care about you. I care about you. A lot. More than I think I’ve cared about any man.”

Her words strike deep, awakening a yearning I've tried so hard to bury. There’s also a mess of emotions in me—fear, hope, a fierce protectiveness. And under it all, an affection for Ellie that's damn near impossible to ignore. I stay silent, flexing my jaw and feeling torn between protecting my heart and giving in.

She's standing there, all vulnerability and open heart, and damn if it doesn't make me want to protect her from everything—including myself.

She inches closer. "Jake?" Her voice is barely above a whisper, but it crashes into me like a wave. My name on her lips is both a plea and a challenge. “I need to know if it's just me, or if you feel it too."

I can’t find any words because I’m afraid of what I’ll say if I open my mouth; I’m afraid I’ll confess that I never want to let her go.

She reaches for my hand, her fingers brushing against my calloused palm. I tense at her touch, heat flaring through my body.

"Say something," she whispers. "Please, Jake."

I meet her gaze, drowning in eyes the color of rich caramel. The love shining there strips away my defenses, leaving me bare. Vulnerable. The walls crumble, and I'm helpless against the force of my need. My longing. Before I can stop myself, I crush Ellie in my arms and capture her mouth. I cup her face with my rough hands, the ones that have fought fires and clung to life, and now they're clinging to her. I kiss her hard, cutting off any chance of backpedaling or second-guessing.

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