Page 55 of Something So Strong

“That’s rich, coming from you. And if you actually like him, it—”

“It would be none of your fucking business!” I snarl through clenched teeth.

“Okay. Okay,” Celeste interjects, holding up a hand to each of us. “We’re going. But you need to sort your shit out.” She points at me and pushes Wade out the door.

When I finally look at Jesse, his forehead is raised and his body language is crying out to hug me.

“This morning’s gonna be busy. More than yesterday.” I turn away from him and back to the computer screen. “Probably won’t have time to chat.”

“S-sure,” Jesse replies again. Except now, it’s laden with realization.

To say we’ve been working solidly, side by side with only a meter between us, for the past four hours wouldn’t be an understatement. But it’s not busier than yesterday. We haven’t been run off our feet, and I know the system now, so technically there was more time when guests weren’t crowding us. Even so, the whole time it’s felt like I have some invisible force field around me forbidding Kai from coming closer. Or acknowledging me for anything non-work related.

I know I said last night that rejection sucked. But at least then I could cling onto the hope that he was only spooked and some sleep would help him come to his senses. But that was before the screams. Before Alma kicked me in the chest and I spent the next three hours on the floor with my back to the door in case he needed me.

All I want is to know if he’s okay.

To ask if he remembers anything.

Seeing him this morning eased so much of my tension. Until he ignored me.

Just being around him made me feel whole. Until he jumped down Wade’s throat.

I know jealousy when I see it, but fuck him if he thinks that’s enough.

If Kai thinks playing caveman—banging his chest and grunting at anyone else who comes near me—is enough, he’s sorely mistaken. I may feel like shit right now, but that won’t stop me from making him as uncomfortable as I am.

Five minutes after the last guest has left, Esther pokes her head through the door. “Good morning, boys?” she asks cheerfully.

We both reply in a monotone hum.

“That good, ha? Who wants first lunch?”

I don’t answer. If Kai wants to get away from me so badly, he can.

“Jess can go first.”

“Whatever.” I fling open the drawer, grab my phone, and storm to the door in a huff.

“Trouble in paradise? You pair seemed like a happy couple yesterday.”

“We’re not a fucking couple,” I curse, slithering past Esther and into the back hall.

“Excuse me?!” she reprimands, but I stay turned away from her. She can fire me if she wants. I couldn’t give any less of a fuck.

“Don’t.” Kai pulls her attention. “He didn’t mean it…”

No. I definitely did.

“... It’s my fault, anyway.”

Aw, what a big boy. Admitting to someone else that you’re all piss and wind after thirty seconds when I’ve been standing next to you for the past four fucking hours!

“What did you do this time?” Esther sighs, closing the door behind her and leaving me in the all-clear.

Not stopping in the staff room, I head straight outside and back to the dorms. Back to more familiar territory, where—for once—I know Kai won’t pop up unexpectedly.

My already atrocious hair is a total bird’s nest by the time I walk through the automatic doors, but I care even less about it than I did this morning. To be honest, I care about a lot of things less than I did this morning. And at the top of that list is whether or not a gap year is still a good idea. School hasn’t started yet, so it’ll be easy enough to un-defer my master’s. Saxon will still have Romeo, and I’ll move back into my room in the terrace. I’ll pay my share of the rent and play landlord for the Airbnb-ers who use the boy’s rooms.

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