Page 90 of Hiding from Hope

“What did he do?” Her question is down right lethal.

“It wasn’t him, Ads, it was me,” I sob and wipe my tears, trying to pull my shit together. I owe her a proper explanation, not this half-assed crying mess. “The secret. It was me. It was about Jessie.” I watch her face change, trying to understand. Her eyes are so intense, the green of them flares, her breathing intensifies, and she promptly strips her robe off, rubbing a frustrated hand down her face before silently waiting for an explanation.

I take a centering breath and explain everything. The existence of the manuscript, the night I found it, the idiotic decision to steal it and give it to Rosie to see if her publisher was interested. I tell her how I read it, explain how incredible it is. I try to move on to explain this morning, but the sobbing won’t stop. I am now hiccupping and trying to control my breathing and instead, crying a mess into the sleeve of Jessie’s shirt.

I note it still smells like him, and it just makes me cry harder.

Rosie proceeds to fill Addy in on this morning’s events. To my shock, Addy’s shoulders just drop, her brows falling, and a gentle smile hits her face before she quickly pads across the room and swings her arms around me. I instantly wrap mine around her, and she shooshes my wailing while rubbing circles on my back.

“It’s going to be okay, Casey,” she whispers.

“You don’t know that. You didn’t see his face,” I sob in return. She pulls back and a pitying but humorous smile sits on her face before she squeezes my shoulders and steps back, nodding.

“But I do. I know him. It’s going to be okay.” Then she just turns and heads straight back into her room, leaving both Rosie and me completely dumbfounded. I look at Rosie and she shrugs.

“Well, at least you stopped crying?” I stare at her for a beat and then burst out with a laugh. She does the same and then brings me into her arms in a firm embrace.

Once again, a crying mess.

Oh, sixteen-year-old Casey would murder me if she could see me now.

“Hey, April, Jessie in?” I don’t bother with the pleasantries. I could barely stop crying enough to be presentable in public, let alone ask someone how their day was. April turns to me from behind the counter and smiles.

“No, he took the day off.” She shrugs and goes back to whatever she is doing behind the counter. I look around the shop, and they are slammed. April seems less than worried about the line of people waiting for their coffee or the stacks of boxes with stock needing to be put away, the pinging from the retail computer I assume are orders from the launch of the store that aren’t being filled, but instead, she is twirling her hair and chatting to the person I assume she is making that coffee for.

“He just took the day off?” April looks at me again and shrugs. Wasn’t he worried about the developer? About bringing in more money? It’s freaking launch day?!

Heaviness sinks low in my stomach. I did this. This was my fault. I ruined him. I blew up his day, wrecked his heart, betrayed his trust. Fuck.

What if he loses the store because of me?

What if the online store is a massive flop all because I am the biggest idiot of them all?!

“Okay, throw me an apron.” I gesture to April, making quick work of heading for the back room and swinging my hair into a topknot.

As I start to head for the counter, April tilts her head and looks at me funny. “What? You… you’re working here?”

“April, I’m sure you’re a lovely girl, but cute and ditzy aren’t adorable anymore.” Her spine straightens, and she drops the hair she was twirling. A light blush hits her cheeks. Glad to know my assumption was right; she was flirting instead of working. I level the other instigator with a look and he scurries off. Freaking kids these days.

“I know you’re intelligent, so use that brain of yours and get back to work. We don’t have time for this. Those three boxes over there have stock that needs to go up.” I point to the boxes, and I see her work mode finally click into place, reading my tone and understanding that I mean business right now. “Have you filled any of those orders yet?” I ask, pointing to the register that has receipts printing like a madman. Reading the stern look on my face, she wastes no time answering and shaking her head. “Right, start there, collections first, then get the ones for shipping done before 4pm. Stock can be done after the rush.”

“What about the coffee?”

“I could make coffee in my sleep,” I mutter and pick the notepad and pen from her apron, shoving it to the front pocket of mine. I watch her dart behind the counter and head for the back, where I assume the packing and collection bags are. When I’m satisfied she has actually followed my instructions, I dig deep into my college days and all that time I spent at Oliver’s Bean Roasters mastering those incredible latte flavors. I plaster my best anti-Addison sunshine smile on and turn to the line of customers.

“Thanks for waiting! What can I get you?”

“Coffee for Dave?” I shout and smile at the guy who collects the to-go order. Nodding, I clear behind the counter and head for the tables. The line has disappeared, the lunch rush now having ended, so I busy myself wiping tables.

“The orders are packed, and Jessie messaged me to flick it off for the rest of the afternoon.”

My heart sinks that he has managed to message April but hasn’t returned a single one of my texts or calls. It makes sense, though. I did this. It was my fault. I spent so long building him up, getting him to open up and trust people again, only to be the one who pulled the rug out from under him. God. I am the worst person in history.

He deserves so much better than me.

I continue wiping the table with my back to April, trying my best to rest my racing heart and not break down while on the clock. He has every right to be pissed at me, and I know this will likely be the end. How could he ever trust me again? Why would he even want to? I am a rotten human.

Even if it feels like my heart has broken into a million pieces, like my chest is caving in and I can’t suck in a breath, I will at least make sure he has a business to come back to when he recovers from the tornado of Casey Baker. I am on a real destruction streak at the moment. Making Grace blow up, lying to Addison, making Rosie lie to Addison. Now this, with the manuscript.

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