Page 74 of Hiding from Hope

“Hang on…” She holds up a finger, shaking her head. Then she does what I really had not expected. She buckles over, her hands landing on her knees. She is… laughing at me.

“Nicely done. I’m glad you stopped by. Have a nice night.” If she wanted to tear me to shreds, she didn’t have to also laugh at me.

“You wait a damn minute!” she shouts as she slams a hand to the door, stopping it from closing, and I seethe down at her.

“What now? Are you not done?” I growl.

“No! In fact, I’m only just getting started, you fucking caveman!” The fact Casey swore in anger is enough to shut me up. She mostly did that to stick a joke… or when I made her come.

She shoves at my chest, pushing me back into the apartment as she slams the door closed, stalking toward me.

“That was Connor at my door,” she clarifies, and my snarl only intensifies. “We are not back together, and you would have learned that had you not cracked a tantrum like a stupid child and stormed off!” Her tone vibrates with rage, and I try desperately not to rip the clothes from her body. Casey is soft, delicate, and so incredibly sexy in her femininity. But when she is flushed from her anger, growling and shouting her words at me with venom? She is something else entirely. She is… fucking otherworldly.

“Tell me, right now, what were you coming over for?” She thrusts a finger to my chest, churning in her anger with her jaw clenched tight, fists balled at her side.

Fuck, I like this side of Casey.

“What does it matter?” I throw back at her, a sneer on my face, as I try to get her to run back to Connor.

“You’re such an idiot, you know that?” she breathes, shaking her head again. “Do you know how tiring it is to be the one to give every fucking day?” Pain shoots up my spine at the accusation.

“Don’t give me that bullshit, Ace. It was never like that with us, not once, and you know that.”

“You’re right. To a point, it was never like that. Except then you’d go to tell me your feelings and push me away instead. But I never left you. I never walked away. I stayed. I gave you everything else instead, so you’d know that I was still here and that I was never fucking leaving you!” A stray tear races down her cheek and it has me dropping all defenses. I never like seeing her cry, and I hate it even more now that it is because of me.

“Well, stop dancing around my fucking feelings, Casey, and tell me something real. Stop pulling back, stop coddling me and behaving in a way you think is for me! Give me you! Tell me the things you want to say without thinking about my fucking feelings or my stupid head!” I punctuate with a fist to my chest, challenging her, staring down at her, encouraging her.

“You want something real?” she challenges back, as she leans in, her eyes brimming with tears full of passion and anger and pain.

“I’m in love with you.” She speaks clearly, and I feel my breath leave without returning.

“I’ve been in love with you since I was sixteen. I might have had boyfriends to fill the hole of loneliness, but it’s always been you. And these last few months I’ve been waiting.” She ends on a huge breath, her fire burning out as each word leaves those pretty pink lips. But my heart races. Rational thought evacuates my brain.

“Waiting for what?” I breathe.

“For you to let yourself finally feel something real. To see me! To want me! I told you, I’m tired, Jessie, and I am. I am so fucking tired of doing the fighting and never being fought for.” I really am a fucking idiot.

I take a step toward her and grip her chin, holding her in place as she tries to take a step away from me. She squeezes her eyes closed and a sob levels my soul as I wipe a tear from her cheeks.

“You want me to be real, too, sunshine?” She sobs, nodding, but her eyes still squeezed closed, leaking the evidence of her pain.

“I’m in love with you,” I whisper in her ear, and when I pull back, she snaps open her eyes, that little mouth open in an adorable look of shock.

My sunshine.

“You… love me?”

“I do. Have since you were twenty-one.” And will forever.

“Why’d you come to my apartment?” she questions again, but steps closer to me, our bodies now touching, and her gaze goes to my lips.

“To tell you those words, and a bunch of other things. To apologize for being a fucking fool. For taking so long, for pushing you away, for not claiming you sooner.”

“Tell me the other things. I want to hear all of them.”

“Casey Baker, you are my guiding star. You burn bright and have thawed my soul. You’re mine. I love you.”

She answers with another tear, but leaps at me, her arms wrapping tightly around my neck and legs wrapping around my waist as I grip her hips.

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