Page 90 of Bad & Bossy

“I don’t want him here anymore,” Dana said, taking a step back until she was side by side with our friend.

Lottie looked between us, her face a mixture of shock and confusion. “Why?”

Dana’s eyes met mine briefly as she squeezed her arms. Behind them were storms of anger and disgust, swirling doubts, and far too much else for me to comprehend without hurting myself more. “I don’t want a drunk around my son,” she said, and before I could even form a rebuttal, she turned and began walking back to Drew’s room.

I stood there for so long, locked and judged and embarrassed beyond belief, that I swore I could feel the dust collecting in my hair.

Fine. If she wanted me gone, if she wanted me out of her life and away from her son, I would do that. I would find it in me to drown her out, no matter how much it hurt.

————

“Cole! Cole, wait, wait, wait!”

A small hand wrapped around my wrist and pulled, spinning me two steps from my car. Lottie stood there, catching her breath, her light blue eyes wide and desperate.

“Come back. Please.”

I shook her hand from me and reached into my pocket for my keys. “She doesn’t want me there.”

“You don’t understand,” Lottie urged, shifting and jumping until she stood between me and my BMW. “She’d just seen her mom downstairs. This has been a lot for her, and with her mom on top of it, she snapped, okay? She wants you there. Believe me, Cole, you need to be there with her. It’s not what you think. She told me what she said to you?—”

“It doesn’t matter, Lots,” I snapped, gently pushing her out of the way so I could open my door. I watched her over the top of it, watched the way her face fell as she realized she wasn’t stopping me. “He’s not my kid, she said so herself. He’s hers, and she gets to decide who sees him and who doesn’t. If she doesn’t want a drunk around him, then you know what? She’s right. I should go.”

Her lips formed a thin line as her hand came to rest on top of mine, holding the door open. She looked over her shoulder, the late autumn wind whipping through the parking garage and tugging at her clothes, before dragging her gaze back to me. “You both have secrets,” she breathed, the words hanging in the air.

They felt too charged, like there was more behind them.

“And I think you’re both lying.”

Chapter 32

Dana

“Ineed to talk to you about something and I really, really don’t want you to chew my head off for it.”

Drew giggled, shoving his little giraffe into his mouth and biting down on it with his two newly formed teeth. We’d just gotten home from the hospital, and with Lottie’s ever-present help, she’d insisted on driving us. He was happy as could be, and although we’d left a little earlier than Cole had originally insisted on, I didn’t want to have to rely on his money for it.

I’d be sending him a check at the first possible opportunity.

“Why does that sound like you’ve done something shitty?” I asked, narrowing my gaze at her over Drew’s head while I washed dishes. He kicked a little in the new holder that Lottie had got me that strapped him to my chest. With Vee now thoroughly kicked out of my house, the new holder would be useful to have him literally attached to me while I worked on cleaning up the house.

Lottie shifted over on the couch, her joggers tightening as she pulled her legs up. “Cause I might have.”

The soapy glass in my hand slipped and fell into the sink full of water, sending bubbles and droplets flying. Drew laughed. I seethed. I could feel the fear sinking into my stomach, filling my mind with every possible thing she could say but somehow I already knew what it was.

“Just say it.”

“I think Cole knows.”

And there it was.

I rested my hands on the counter, digging my nails into the linoleum-wrapped cheap wood. He was already catching on. This isn’t a massive leap. “How did this happen?” I snapped, irritation building in my gut.

I’d made my choice at the hospital. And although a part of me regretted it, I’d told him he wasn’t Cole’s father. I’d asked him to go. I’d told him that I couldn’t have him near my son. The words behind them were clear—we’re done. I went with my gut, and I had to stick by that, no matter how many nights I cried myself to sleep or felt like I couldn’t breathe while reading Drew a story.

But we didn’t need him to survive, and that’s what I would have to do now—survive. Yes, he made life easier, but I couldn’t care less if the next seventeen years of my life were back-breaking as a single mother if it meant keeping Drew away from the shit and the hell that I had to grow up around. My mother was the worst thing that happened to me, and my father was guilty by association. I didn’t want Drew to ever know what that felt like.

“I didn’t say it outright,” Lottie sighed. “But I tried to get him to come back after you’d told him to leave. I’m sorry. I just—both of you are my friends, and I felt like you were both making a decision you would regret.”

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