Page 11 of Night Shift

“Vanilla?” Bethany echoed, her curiosity piqued.

“Yeah.” I didn’t elaborate, and she didn’t push for more.

I sipped my coffee, feeling a bit out of my depth. The world of relationships and casual sex was a far cry from what I was used to. Mostly, I’d only ever focused on school and work. I hadn’t had time for much else. Bethany’s frankness was refreshing, but it also highlighted how inexperienced I really was. It wasn’t that I was particularly uninterested in sex, only that it hadn’t been a priority for me.

I ate my food, and she returned to her magazine, but my thoughts kept drifting back to our conversation. Bethany’s revelation about her history with Atticus didn’t surprise me, but her advice to watch out for him did.

I didn’t want a relationship with anyone, much less with someone like him. He was abrasive, and he had a reputation for being callous with everyone he worked with. No, I wanted a man who would treat me right, a man who could be both a protector and a provider. Hot as hell on the outside but a cinnamon roll on the inside—the perfect combination of sweet and spicy. But that was probably just the idealist in me. I doubted I’d ever find that kind of man in reality.

I turned to Bethany and said, “You know, you didn’t need to warn me off of Dr. Thorin. I have no interest in him, or any man, right now.”

“No?” Her brows rose, curiosity lighting up her eyes. “Not even for a night of fun?”

Heat crept into my cheeks. “I haven’t…I mean, I’m not really interested in casual sex.”

“Oh.” Her eyes narrowed as understanding dawned. “You’re a virgin.”

“What? No!” I scoffed, glancing around uncomfortably, glad there wasn’t anyone else in the break room. The last thing I needed was for the entire staff to know about my sex life, or lack thereof. “I’ve had sex. I’m just not a fan of meaningless hookups.”

“How was it?” Bethany asked, lifting one brow inquisitively. “Your last relationship, I mean.”

I busied myself with picking at my bag of chips, discomfort swirling in my chest. The truth was, I’d never enjoyed sex. I’d always been too focused on trying to please my boyfriend Benji in college to relax and enjoy anything myself. He was definitely not worth getting an IUD for; I dreaded the day I would have to get a new one.

“Well, you know…always quick, no fireworks. I never really got why people make such a big deal over sex.”

Bethany’s eyes widened, and she leaned back, assessing me. “Sam, are you saying you’ve never had…good sex? You can talk to me, you know.” She touched my arm, regarding me with sincere kindness. “I won’t judge you or repeat a word.”

I sighed, debating how much to confess. But this was Bethany, the only friend I had in this city. At least, I hoped she was my friend. “Sex has never really been all that great for me,” I admitted. “I don’t know what all the fuss is about. I don’t know, it’s just so awkward. Oh my God, I feel like such an idiot talking about it.” Leaning my elbows on the table, I covered my face.

“Oh, Sam.” She pulled me into a side hug, rubbing my back. “You just haven’t had it with the right person, that’s all. When you meet someone you truly connect with, who takes the time to make sure you enjoy yourself…it’ll be a whole different experience.”

I shook my head, pulling away. “I doubt that. Besides, it’s not like I have time to date. This job keeps me busy enough as it is.”

“You sound like a damn nun. Trust me, good sex is worth the effort,” Bethany insisted. “There’s someone, or maybe lots of someones, out there for everyone,” she said, wagging her brows. “You just have to be patient.”

“Can we please change the subject?” I grabbed my trash, got up, and tossed it in the can, eager to escape this conversation.

Bethany followed, dropping her voice to a whisper. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to embarrass you. But promise me you won’t write off sex completely. When you meet the right person, it can be—”

“Evening, Dr. Thorin. What’s got you so lost in thought? I noticed you’ve been standing out here in the hallway for a while now,” said a voice I recognized as one of the night janitors.

Bethany threw her hand over her mouth, and I stumbled back with a yelp. Dr. Thorin stepped into the doorway, nodding briefly at the janitor. “Have a good shift, Harold,” he said as the man walked past the doorway. His gaze flickered back and forth from Bethany to me, a muscle twitching in his jaw.

“Atticus! I mean, Dr. Thorin!” Bethany exclaimed, cheeks flaming. “What are you—we were just—”

He held up a hand, narrowing his eyes at me. My pulse hammered against my temples as a panic attack threatened to creep up from my chest and choke me. He’d been eavesdropping on our conversation. How much had he overheard? From the look on his face, it had been more than enough.

Bethany shot me an apologetic grimace and hurried off, flipping him the finger as she whipped past him. Now I was alone with Dr. Thorin, acutely aware of his formidable presence and the curiosity simmering in his gaze. My stomach knotted with nerves, though I couldn’t say exactly why.

I cleared my throat, desperate to fill the tense silence. “Did you need something, Dr. Thorin?”

“No. But a word of warning.” His voice was low, rough. “Bethany means well, but she has a habit of meddling where she shouldn’t. Whatever she told you about me, I suggest you disregard it.”

My cheeks flamed even hotter. So he had overheard enough to know that Bethany was gossiping about him. I stared determinedly at the floor, humiliated. If that was the case, he’d also heard us talking about my ridiculously pathetic sex life.

“I apologize for any inappropriate discussion,” I said, the words spewing out of my mouth as if it had a mind of its own. “It won’t happen again.” Somewhere under the layers of embarrassment, I knew I had nothing to apologize for, but no other words would come.

He moved closer, and I caught a whiff of his clean scent—no cologne, just the man. “I might be an asshole, but don’t believe her ridiculous stories. I’m not some playboy sleeping my way through the hospital staff.”

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