Page 20 of Peace Under Fire

He stood there, the silent cell phone warm in his hand.

She’d been dreaming about him for years?

Years?

Not a year, which was how long she’d lived next door to him. But for years, as in multiple. She’d been dreaming about him long before they’d met. And she’d tracked him down?

What the fuck did that mean?

* * *

Mandy disconnected the phone call and took a deep, shaky breath.

Hopefully, Jacob hadn’t picked up on the hysterical edge to her laughter when he’d accused her of being a virgin.

Which, admittedly, she was. But he certainly didn’t need to know that. Not when he obviously found the condition so unappealing.

She was neither ashamed nor proud of her virginity. The choice hadn’t been a deliberate one, but rather the result of her messed up adolescence and early adulthood. There hadn’t been the opportunity for sexual exploration.

When one spent their childhood in a prison and their adolescence and adulthood in hiding, it was difficult to find the means or men for romantic interludes.

She hadn’t gone to school, at least not a real school. Nor had she gone to church, or college, or even held a job. There had been no public shopping or meetings or bar hopping, so no place or time to meet members of the opposite sex.

It didn’t help that her older sisters had been so steadfast in their warnings to avoid any situations that could conceivably expose them to the cockroaches, which was practically everything that might have led to a boyfriend, or even a one-night stand.

Add in the fact she’d been obsessed with Jacob for as long as she could remember. She hadn’t wanted to explore her sexuality with anyone else. It wasn’t that she was saving herself for him—at least not consciously. It was more like meeting other men had been of no interest.

So, yes, at the ripe old age of twenty-eight, she was still a virgin. Which in Jacob’s eyes made her a freak.

Lovely.

Just one more thing for him to dislike about her, along with her cookies, her smiles, and apparently her lack of swearing.

In fact, judging by their telephone conversation, there wasn’t anything about her that Jacob found attractive. Oh, sure, he’d pretended otherwise a few minutes ago, but everything he’d said to her previously, along with most of what he'd just told her over the phone, proved otherwise.

She poked the curtain aside with more vehemence than necessary and glared down at the gray truck squatting in the parking lot.

Who would have thought that virginity was a deal breaker?

Giulia was right. It was time to give up on this idiotic fantasy and go home.

She’d heard none of the pain in his voice that she’d sensed in her dreams. Sure, he’d been terse. But he was always terse.

She rubbed at the dull ache in her chest and stepped back from the window, letting the curtain fall back into place. There was no reason to stay here. Insisting on doing so just made her pathetic.

She turned toward the bed and her suitcase. Time to return home.

But with Jacob and the military looking for her, escaping the condo complex might not be so easy. The building could be under surveillance.

Thank God she’d taken Kaylee’s advice and stashed her car a couple of miles from the condos. Last year, when no one had shown any suspicion about her sudden presence in the building, she’d almost moved her car into the complex’s parking lot. It had been so inconvenient waiting for taxis or buses anytime she wanted to go somewhere.

Kaylee had reminded her the car, as well as the driver’s license taped beneath the driver’s seat, were registered to Jennifer Carness. If anyone ran the plates, the results would raise all kinds of awkward questions.

At least with the car parked off-site, under a different identity, she didn’t have to worry about being nabbed when she showed up to retrieve it.

She grimaced. Nope, she just had to worry about getting caught when she left the building.

Precautions were in order in case the condo complex was under surveillance. She’d change into her darkest clothes and wait until well after midnight when most the residents would be fast asleep. If she exited the building from one of the side or back doors and stuck to the shadows she should be able to slip away unnoticed.

---