Page 43 of Ranger Bravery

“I love you, Jackson. I know that with certainty, but everything else… how this will work… I don’t have a clue. You deserve so much better than me. I’m riddled with problems, and they’ll only drag you down.” He opened his mouth to answer her, but she cut him off with a shake of her head. “Wait, let me say this. Nothing about my life is normal. My feelings get lodged inside, and I don’t know how to let them out. It’s not easy for me to trust. I know there are good marriages, but I have no idea how to build one. My first instinct is to protect you because I know it’s only a matter of time before I screw everything up.”

He gently squeezed her hand. “Is that why you left ten years ago?”

“Of course. My PTSD was out of control. No one could touch me and I was jumping at every shadow. It made everything worse.” She bit her lip. “Like I said, you deserve better than me.”

Jackson’s first instinct was to argue. There was no one better than Piper. The loyalty she had for her family, the dedication to her job, the gentleness she used with her niece and nephew… she was by far the best woman he’d ever known. But he sensed none of that would convince her, so he took a different tack instead. “Don’t you think that’s my decision?”

She blinked, obviously caught off-guard. “What?”

“I’ve decided you’re the woman for me, Piper, and there’s nothing you can do about it. Whether I love you or not is my choice. So, the way I see it, you and I can figure out a way to make this work, or you can cut me off again. Run away from this. From us. I’m praying you won’t though. Because I don’t want to live my life without you.” Jackson turned to face her. “And for the record, I don’t deserve better than you. I’m messed up too. We all have our scars and our wounds. My mom ran out on me when I was eight. She left me behind like a discarded shoe. There are times I doubt myself and my worth. When your mom doesn’t love you…”

How could he explain the depth of that wound? There were no words for it.

Piper sighed and gently squeezed his hand. “Yeah, I know.”

She did know. Jackson breathed out. “I also don’t know what it takes to make a marriage work. All I know is that I love you. I believe in us.”

His cell phone chirped. Jackson was irritated by the interruption, but there was nothing to be done about it. He retrieved the device from the cup holder and hit the button.

“We’ve got movement,” Daniel said in a low voice. “Mercedes heading to the parking lot.”

Shawn drove a Mercedes. Jackson’s muscles tensed and he glanced at Piper. “It’s go time.”

She unbuckled her seat belt and twisted between the seats, landing in a heap on the back bench. Dropping to the floor, she pulled her handgun. A safety precaution in case Shawn tried to hurt Jackson.

Headlights turned into the parking lot. Jackson’s heart rate quickened. “Going dark.” He lowered the volume on his phone but left the connection to his teammates open. Daniel and Bennett would hear everything. Jackson also quickly opened a recording app on his phone before clicking the screen off. Texas was a one-party consent state. Shawn didn’t have to know he was being recorded.

Layer after layer of security. He prayed it wouldn’t be necessary.

The Mercedes pulled up next to Jackson’s vehicle. Shawn hopped out and quickly jumped into the passenger seat. He swiped water off his face. “Thanks for meeting me.”

Jackson purposefully didn’t look at Piper. He didn’t want Shawn to realize she was there. Instead, he focused on his childhood friend. The lighting was dim, but even in the darkness, it was obvious Shawn was exhausted. His hair was mussed and his tie askew. Dark circles shadowed the area under his eyes. He nervously scanned the parking lot as if the boogie man was about to jump out of the woods.

Was someone out there? Was Shawn working with Wally? Or Todd?

If so, hopefully Daniel or Bennett would spot the man before he could carry out a plan of attack. Jackson forced himself to focus on the matter at hand. “What’s going on, Shawn? What information do you have that you couldn’t give me over the phone?”

“I need some questions answered first. Is Wally responsible for Elena’s death?”

“He’s a suspect.” Jackson didn’t mention Todd was also a suspect. He didn’t owe Shawn any explanations, nor was he going to let his friend ask all the questions. “Did your wife really know about the affair?”

He was quiet for a long moment. “No. My father convinced her to lie by making her a partner in our law firm.” Shawn sighed. “My marriage has been on the rocks for a long time. Melanie broke her vows first, and I was so mad that I did the same with Elena. It wasn’t right. I know that now. But I was too caught up in everything to understand how much damage I was doing.” He rubbed his eyes, and a sob rose in his throat. “I loved her, you know. Elena. I wanted to divorce my wife and marry her.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“Because of my father.” He swiped at his wet cheeks as anger filled his tone. “He would’ve cut me off financially for marrying Elena. She’s below us, according to him. I’d lose the firm. I did my best to explain that to Elena, but she…” Shawn sighed. “She wanted more. I couldn’t give it to her.”

“That didn’t stop you from calling and texting her dozens of times.”

He shrugged. “I wanted her back. Do you have any idea what it’s like to walk into work, see the woman you were meant to be with, and not be able to do anything about it? I was losing my mind. It was the first time I was truly in love with someone. It was also the first time I’d ever had my heart broken.”

Jackson could believe that. Shawn had always treated his girlfriends as interchangeable. “You don’t love your wife?”

“At one point, maybe I did. But things quickly soured after we got married. I realized…” He blew out a breath. “I married her because my father wanted it. Because it was expected. Melanie is from a good family with wealth and ties to the governor. The marriage made sense on paper. It was a disaster in real life.”

Everything he said made sense, but Jackson had the lingering impression, once again, that he was being handled. Shawn was Paul’s son after all. He learned to manipulate a situation to his advantage from the best. “What do you want from me, Shawn?”

“I want to know that you’re going to do everything possible to get justice for Elena. I want her killer caught.”

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