Page 67 of A Little Light

“Bye, Rae.”

Rachel threw her phone to the couch and rushed to the door. She opened it, her pulse quickening. It was Andi, and Rachel couldn’t read the expression on her face.

“Hi.” Andi remained out in the corridor, her knuckles white where she held the strap of her bag. “Do you have a minute?”

Rachel stepped aside, choosing not to say anything. Before she poured her heart out, she wanted to get a feel for what Andi was thinking.

“Thank you. I…won’t keep you long.”

So, Andi had no plans to stay. That said a lot. Far more than Rachel wanted it to. All she wanted for the rest of this day was to get comfortable with Andi, hold her, and appreciate the trust she was putting in Rachel. But she knew friends always came first. “That’s okay. I’m not busy.”

Andi lowered her bag as Rachel closed the door, standing awkwardly in the middle of the loft. “I wasn’t sure if you’d want to see me or not, but I had to come over and check that you’re okay.”

Don’t cry. Rachel smiled. “I’m okay.”

“Really? Because you look as though you’ve been crying.”

“I was hoping you wouldn’t notice that.” Rachel motioned towards the coffee machine. “Did you want coffee?”

“Only if you’re absolutely certain you want me here, Rachel. I know what I want…where I want to be, but I have to apologise for Sally back at the coffee shop. I should have taken into account how it may have made you feel, and I didn’t.”

Rachel waved a hand. “I’m used to it.”

“That doesn’t mean it shouldn’t bother you. Sally was way out of line, and I…potentially lost a friend today.” Andi’s voice broke as she said that. Rachel spun around, frowning. Andi and Sally were no longer friends? No, Rachel couldn’t let that happen. “I don’t know why she said the things she did, but I don’t want that in my life.”

“Andi, you have to work things out with her. She’s your best friend.” As Andi slumped against the island, she placed her head in her hands and sobbed. Rachel rushed to her side, wrapping an arm around her waist. “Hey, come on. Don’t be upset. You’ll figure it out together. Don’t let someone like me come between you.”

She buried her face in Rachel’s neck, her shoulders shaking.

“Andi, please. I know you think that you’re doing the right thing in walking away from her, but you’ve been through so much together. Sally has been there for you when you needed her. Don’t fall out, please.”

Andi lifted her head and wiped at her cheeks. “It’s too late. She said she can’t get on board with this. With us.”

Rachel sighed. Right now, she wished Andi had told everyone who she was before they’d gotten in too deep. Her heart tightened at the thought of never seeing Andi again. As friends simply wasn’t good enough for her. “While it hurts to know that, I only want the best for you. Sally is far more important than I am, and we both know that.”

Andi’s brows drew together. “N-no. That’s…no.”

“Andi.”

“I want to be with you. I want to keep doing this, us, and enjoy every moment of it. Please, don’t ask me to walk away because my friend can’t deal with something. That’s not the kind of person I am.”

“God, I know.” Rachel placed her hands on Andi’s chest, her head cocked. “I know exactly who you are, and I know you need your circle around you. Rightfully so.”

Andi lowered her head, scoffing lightly. “So, you want to end this.”

“The last thing I want is to end this. Being with you has been amazing, and I really don’t want us to end. But…what’s the best way forward for you? Not for me, but you?”

“To be with you, Rachel. It’s really that simple.” Andi took Rachel’s hands and brought them to her lips. She kissed her knuckles and smiled. “Sally can deal with her feelings herself. I’m a woman in my fifties…I have no reason to do anything other than choose myself. And in doing that, it means I choose you. You make me happy, and if my friends can’t understand that, then I feel sorry for them.”

Rachel could only smile at that while leaning in and kissing Andi. “You really mean that?”

“Of course I mean it. Sally will either come around to it, or she won’t.”

Rachel rested her head against Andi’s chest, her eyes closing when Andi kissed her hair.

“Please don’t worry about any of this. What will be will be.” Andi took a step back, her deep brown eyes soft…and a little puffy. “Now, how about you make us that coffee, and we decide on our Christmas Day plans?”

“I’d love that.”

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