Andi nodded. “And I was right. Nobody will ever compare to Jane.”
“And I’m not saying that anyone you meet in the future has to…or will.”
Shaking her head, Andi lifted her cup and finished her drink. She didn’t want to think about what she’d lost. She didn’t want to cry and be sad anymore. She just wanted to enjoy a rare night out. The property market was booming lately. She didn’t know the next time this would be possible.
“Can we just catch up tonight? I’ve missed spending time with you lately, and I want to enjoy it. We can do whatever this is another time.”
Sally lifted a shoulder, seemingly satisfied with that. “That works for me. Does this mean we can move onto a bar at some point, though?”
“Maybe. I’m pacing myself.” Andi turned her watch towards herself. “It is only seven, after all. And we need to eat.”
“I’m holding you to that.”
* * *
Andi shifted from side to side, waiting patiently—just about—for another hot chocolate. Sally sat at their table, talking animatedly to one of their friends on the phone. She’d missed this. Not running herself into the ground to keep busy. Not obsessively looking for something to do just so she didn’t feel so alone.
This was nice. It was familiar once. It was something Andi wanted to keep doing. Jane would hate the idea of Andi being home alone night after night. She would also hate knowing that Andi was at a Christmas market…drinking hot chocolate.
Why? Because Christmas markets always involved mulled wine and spiced cider in the past. But those things reminded Andi of a life she didn’t have anymore. She wasn’t ready to go back to old traditions just yet, but this was a step in the right direction. She hadn’t left the house in the run up to Christmas at all last year, she hadn’t bothered to put up a Christmas tree, and sadly, she’d spent Christmas Day alone.
Her friends and family didn’t know that. She’d told them all she was going elsewhere. But being alone was what Andi had wanted and needed last year. This time…not so much.
Sally was right. She needed to start living her life again. She needed to find a new normal and new traditions, all while remembering Jane in her own ways. Jane wasn’t a woman Andi could ever forget, nor would she ever wish to leave their memories behind. Those days had been the best of Andi’s life. God help anyone who tried to top the life she’d had with Jane. That wasn’t something she was sure could be matched or bettered.
But life wasn’t about comparisons, not really. Life was about being fulfilled in whatever way you could do so. It was about change and difficulties that you faced head on. Andi had always liked a challenge—there was a time when Jane had been one—and she was determined to have a wonderful Christmas with the people she was lucky to have in her life. Friends, family, work colleagues. This year, she was taking whatever she could get, and she was going to make it count.
Jane was gone, and if Andi had learnt anything from it all, it was that she didn’t know when her time would come. Why not make the most of what days she did have?
Smiling when the barista at the small hut placed her hot chocolate down, Andi took it and added a few marshmallows from the glass jar.
“There’s nothing available. It’s all rubbish or a huge project. I just want a place I can move into and feel comfortable.”
Andi’s ears pricked at the sound of a woman’s voice beside her. She lingered a moment, rudely eavesdropping.
“Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a loft in Liverpool? And before you say anything else, I don’t want a house. I don’t want a garden. I just want something that feels like me. Which is a loft. On the dock. Why isn’t anyone selling up? I thought since the lockdowns, people wanted space and gardens?”
Andi cleared her throat and turned around. The blonde woman who spoke on the phone eyed her. Though she may have been wearing a frown, her beautiful blue eyes immediately caught Andi’s attention. “Can I help you?”
“Sorry, I overheard your conversation.”
The woman scoffed, shaking her head. “I’ll call you back later. Seems people around here don’t know how to mind their own business.”
Andi’s brows rose at that. Maybe she wouldn’t help this woman after all. Which was a shame for them both since Andi was about to put a loft up for sale in the coming days.
The woman lowered her phone from her ear and locked it, shoving it into her pocket. “Happy now?”
With a slight smile directed at her, Andi chose not to hand over her business card. “Never mind. I was just trying to help. Have a lovely evening.”
Andi took her hot chocolate then turned and walked away, stopping suddenly when a small child crashed into her. The child apologised as she wobbled on her feet, but Andi could only smile at her. No harm done. “That’s okay.”
As she reached the table Sally sat at, her best friend belly laughing as she continued her call, she looked up to find the woman at the hut watching her. When she wasn’t so angry, she had a beautiful face. A striking jawline and penetrating blue eyes.
“Okay, well, Andi is back so I’d better go. Call you through the week. Bye.” Sally puffed out a breath, shaking her head. “Hillary sends her love…and has invited you over for a Christmas party.”
“It’s not Christmas for another seven weeks.” Six and a half, but who was counting?
“Oh, I don’t know when it is. She just asked me to mention it and said that she’d be in touch with more details when she has them.”