Page 66 of Reckless

“She’s pretty,” she says.

“What she looks like has nothing to do with this. What we’re doing has nothing to do with anyone. Including you, Sol.”

“Well that’s fucking hurtful. I’m supposed to be your best friend.”

“You are my best friend, but that doesn’t mean I need to tell you every minute detail of what I’m doing every single day. Plus, it’s kinda creepy. You’re obsessing over her.”

“Forgive me for wanting to look out for you. How else am I supposed to do it when you left?”

“Sol, I explained why I did that.”

“I know you did, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt, Jude. You won’t let me help you. How do you think that makes me feel?”

I bite my tongue from saying what I want. That this isn’t about her. It’s about me. Solene isn’t usually a needy person. She cares about her friends and under normal circumstances, I would believe she only has good intentions. There is something else going on here. I’m not sure what.

“So just how far is this relationship with Krista Benke going? Are you just road trip buddies, or has the infamous Jude Smallwood charm worked its way into her underwear?”

“That’s none of your business.”

Her eyes narrow. She always could read me, no matter how much of a poker face I put on. Usually I can read her too, but right now, I’ve got no clue what is going on inside her head.

“You seem different,” she pouts.

“I’m not. I’m just figuring things out. You know what a mess my head has been. And Sol, this is helping. The road trip, being away from LA. Not having to worry about any shit with the band or Cody. The last few days have changed me. Maybe. If that is what you mean, then it’s a good thing.”

“She’s helping too?” She crosses her legs and sips her drink.

“Yeah,” I answer. I’m still not going to tell her Krista and I are involved in something more than the road trip. I’m not explaining any of that to her. It’s private. “She’s a good listener. She has a different way of looking at the world and when she talks it… all makes sense.”

“Do you hear yourself? You sound like a lovesick fool.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“What do you think it means? You’re talking about her like she’s your savior.”

“Maybe she is.”

“For real?” She rears back and widens her eyes when I shrug my shoulders. “Are you serious?”

“Right now, she’s what I need.”

“And at the end of the two weeks? Are you being fair to her?”

There is no answer to that because I don’t know. The thought of not being around Krista in just over a week's time leaves a strange sensation in my stomach. An empty kind of ache. Hearing it stated that way makes me sick to my stomach. Am I being fair to Krista?

“You’re relying on her. You’re using her as a crutch. And just what does she get out of it? Your dick?”

“Don’t say shit like that,” I snap and walk back over to the bar. “It isn’t like that. For either of us.”

Instead of pouring another shot, I grab the bottle and walk back over. I sit down on the same couch as Solene this time. After pouring myself a shot, I pour her one too. If I didn’t know her as well as I do, I’d say it sounds a lot like she is jealous. But that isn’t how things are between me and Solene.

Unless. Fuck, is that what this is? Is she trying to tell me something?

“Oh my God, I can see right through that face,” she turns to me, one hand on her chest like she’s about to faint or puke. “This isn’t about me having feelings for you. You know that makes me want to gag. Uh, the thought of your dick anywhere near me.”

“Enough, okay. No one needs to hear that shit. And please, forgive me for misreading the jealous psycho bitch you’re acting like.”

Any other woman would have got real pissed about that. Sol’s lip tips up in a smirk.

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