Page 36 of The Afterthought

No, there’s no way he knew who I was. I need to figure out what I'm going to do with this information. The normal reaction would be to immediately cut ties, but that's not where my mind goes.

"Tell me who put those marks on your chest and stomach." He interrupts my thoughts.

"We're not talking about that tonight."

"I'm not leaving here until you tell me."

Fuck, he will literally stay here too. I use the one thing I know I can against him—his weakness for me right now. "I'll tell you. I promise. I'm just tired, and it's hard to talk about it." I give him the saddest eyes I can while looking at him. "Can we please just talk about this another day? I promise to tell you everything."

His eyes bounce back and forth between mine, clearly conflicted. "You will tell me."

I nod, and he lets it go. "I really need to get some sleep. Tonight was a lot."

He stands up and pulls me into a hug. I relax into him so that he doesn't suspect anything. I don't want to give him any reason to try and linger. I just need him to leave. Things between us won't be any different tomorrow, regardless of whatever claim he thinks he has over me. I can’t allow it to be different after how badly he hurt me.

When he pulls back, I notice he’s chewing on a piece of gum. He must have put it in before I came out of my bedroom. I get a whiff of cinnamon. The smell brings me back to that day. No, no, no. Not now. I feel wobbly and put my hand on the table, trying to steady myself, but it's useless. The memories pull me in.

Chapter 17

Avalynn

"You little fucking bitch. Did my wife hire you to follow me? Did she think it would be that easy to get rid of me? Sending some pathetic girl to trail me and try and catch me in a fuckup." Spit from the intensity of his words came down to coat my face. The smell of cinnamon protruded from his mouth. It was similar to the smell of the Big Red gum from the grocery store.

His grip around my throat tightened when his other hand moved to his pocket. He pulled out a knife, and my eyes widened, silently begging for him to let me go. The small breaths I was able to take quickened when I caught sight of the blade. I tried to kick out from under him, but it was useless. My body was tired from the lack of oxygen, and he was bigger than me. I couldn't breathe, but the cinnamon smell burned through my nostrils.

The blade came down across my chest first, cutting my shirt open and slicing me down the center of my body. I felt the warm blood almost instantly pooling around the cut.

I tried my best to kick around and free myself from him as he held the knife above me, watching as the blood flowed freely from me. He laughed at my attempt to speak. His hand tightened further on my neck, threatening to completely cut off my airway.

"You can't report back to my wife if you're dead, you fucking bitch," he yelled as I felt the blade slice into my stomach this time. I was too worried about trying to breathe to focus on anything else. Over and over, he cut into the skin of my stomach and chest, marking me up. The wetness of the blood was all I could feel as the tears flowed freely down my cheeks. Time seemed to go on forever, an endless loop of suffering in hell.

He stood up to spit on me. His saliva landed on my face, but I couldn't move. The mixture of the spicy scent with the wetness of the blood and spit consumed me. I'm going to die here, was all I could think. He was gone now, but I still couldn't move. I couldn't get up. I tried to yell out, but nothing came from my voice. I was too weak. My phone. I just needed to reach my phone. Everything was so blurry, but I dialed 911 before I felt my head lull to the side and let the darkness welcome me.

"Ma'am," a stranger says, waking me up. "You're going to be okay."

"You're going to be okay." I hear someone whisper in my ear while rubbing my back.

I'm on the floor now, pulled against Greyson's chest, gripping his shirt as he rubs up and down my back. Oh no. I let him see me triggered again. He isn't going to let this go now that he's seen the scars, too. I close my eyes for a moment and lose myself in the comfort of his touch, but I still smell the cinnamon on him.

"Cinnamon," I say as I try to stay centered, but the memories are pulling at the corners of my mind.

"What?" he questions as I try to pull myself away from him. He only holds me tighter, like he never wants to let me go. I want to feel safe in his hold, but the cinnamon smell is overpowering. I catch another whiff, and again, I fall into the memories.

It was supposed to be easy. All I had to do was sneak in and snap a couple of pictures to give to his wife, and I would’ve been fine. It's a job that I did countless times. There is never a shortage of shady men in the world that wives need followed.

David and Ashley were in the middle of a pretty dirty divorce, and she was trying to get custody of their children. David had a nasty drug addiction.

"Ava baby, what's happening?" He lifts the two of us off of the floor, bringing me back to the moment, and carries me over to the couch. After carefully setting me down, he kneels on the floor in front of me, grabbing my hands and looking up.

"It's the cinnamon smell. I can't smell it without... Never mind. Can you just go rinse with the mouthwash in the bathroom?" My words come out like a plea.

I look away from him just as his jaw tics. He can see my vulnerability, but he doesn't fight me further. He stands, and just before he turns, he grips my chin and forces me to look up at him.

"When I get back, we're talking about this." He doesn't give me a chance to answer. The next thing I know, he’s in the bathroom clanking around.

I don't like the way I feel after I'm triggered into these flashbacks. I pull my knees up to my chest and wrap my arms around them. A dull ache begins to spread through my head. I'm exhausted after the events of the day. I really just want to go to bed. My head comes down to rest on top of my knees, and I let out a deep sigh.

I feel the cushion beside me sink down, and an arm wraps around me, pulling me into his warm chest. We sit like this for a few moments, and I let my mind wander to how different things could have been. I may have never ended up at the hands of David if Greyson had just manned up. Instead, he pushed me away, and the entirety of my life changed. Everything would have been different if he had chosen me back then. I let a tear fall from my cheek before putting my wall back up.