Page 55 of Craving Cooper

“I’ve been a couple of times… with Brady,” he says with a grin on his face.

“And for dinner?” I ask, with less of a tease this time.

“A few times,” he says. “Although not with Brady.”

“With Meredith?” I don’t know why I need to ask, but I do.

He leans in and sighs. “Not exclusively. Why? Is she gonna be a problem?” I shake my head, even though I’m not sure about my answer, and as though he’s guessed that, he reaches out, taking my hand in his, which feels reassuring. “She used to spend a lot of time at my apartment, as I’m sure you’re aware, but we went out from time to time. Sometimes we’d come here, or go to Dawson’s Bar, or the restaurant.” He takes a breath, but not a long one. “Unless you and I are gonna avoid doing any of those things, or we’re gonna move to a different town altogether, do you think you could accommodate my past and Meredith’s role in it?”

My heart is fluttering in my chest, and I stare at him for a moment longer, before lowering my gaze to our hands, noticing how our fingers are entwined. My hand looks so tiny in his, but there’s something about that; something that makes me feel… safe.

Safe…

I’ve never felt that way before. It’s new, and exciting, and so, so comforting. But I can’t let it overwhelm me… not until I know for sure.

“Do I need to accommodate it?” I ask.

“Yes. You do.”

“Why?”

I know I said that understanding why didn’t matter anymore, but this feels too momentous not to at least try.

“Because if you can’t deal with the past, the future’s gonna be kinda difficult,” he says.

“Th—The future?”

“Yeah. The future. The one I think I’d like us to have… together.”

“You only think? You don’t know?”

He shakes his head, although he’s smiling, and while I wish this didn’t have to matter so much, it does.

“This is all new to me, Mallory,” he says, eventually. “It’s like you and the menu. None of that made sense to you, did it?”

“Not really.”

“That’s how I feel. Nothing that’s happening to me makes the slightest bit of sense, but just like you still wanna eat, I still wanna do whatever it is we’re doing.”

“You don’t know what we’re doing?”

“No… but I don’t need to understand it. Not as long as we’re doing it together.”

“You mean that?”

“Absolutely. Although you’re gonna have to make some allowances,” he says, giving my hand a gentle squeeze.

“I am?”

“Yeah. I’m finding my way here. So, you’re gonna have to forgive me if I say or do the wrong thing from time to time. I’ve never… I’ve never felt like this before, you see?”

Is he saying what I think he’s saying?

He must be, mustn’t he?

Should I ask him?

No!

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