Page 50 of Craving Cooper

“Why wouldn’t you?”

“Because I don’t feel like I know what to do, or how to act, or what to say… and because I’m not sure Mallory’s even speaking to me. I tried talking it through with her yesterday afternoon. I explained, and I apologized, but she’s so damn mad at me.”

“That’s not a new sensation for you. Women have been mad at you before.”

“Yeah, but I’ve never cared before… and besides, I’ve always known they’d come back. I can’t even be certain Mallory will be at work in the morning.” Although the thought that she won’t be fills me with fear.

“She’ll be there,” Brady says with reassuring certainty in his voice, although I still feel a shadow of doubt.

“If she is, it’ll be because she’s responsible, not because she feels anything for me.”

He shakes his head. “Okay, if you wanna wallow in self pity, you go ahead. Or you could try something radical.”

“Like what?”

“Talking to her.”

“I told you, I already tried that.”

“Then try again,” he says. “I get that every woman you’ve ever been with has always come running back to you whenever you’ve had a fight, but maybe you’re gonna have to accept that this time is different. Maybe you’re gonna have to be the one to make the moves.”

“How?”

“Do whatever it takes. Explain it to her again, tell her you’re sorry, even if you’ve said it before… hell, beg for her forgiveness, if you have to.”

“Beg? I’ve never even asked, let alone begged.” He laughs and I let out a sigh. “Promise me it’s worth it?”

“It’s worth it,” he says. “And I guarantee you won’t regret it.”

He checks his watch and I realize I’ve kept him talking for quite a while.

“You need to go.”

“I do. Sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

We both quickly gulp down the last of our coffee and head for the door.

Once we’re outside, he turns to me and tilts his head. “Are you gonna be okay?”

“I think so. Although I’m not sure I’m gonna talk to Mallory this afternoon. I think I need to give her some time.”

“And you need to work on your begging strategies?” he says, smiling.

“Something like that.”

“Call me if you need to.”

I nod my head, no further words needed. He knows I’m grateful without me having to say it, and he turns away, walking toward Cedar Street with a spring in his step.

It’s strange, but I always thought I was happy with my life. I thought I had it made, and that Brady was the fool for wanting to live such a settled and domesticated existence. I used to tell myself I wouldn’t give up my freedom for anyone or anything. Now, I’m not so sure. I’m starting to think that, if Mallory would give me a chance, I’d give up everything for her… and I wouldn’t regret it for a moment.

I was true to my word.

I didn’t go upstairs and speak to Mallory after I’d finished with Brady. Although I think it had more to do with giving her time than with working on begging strategies. Like I said to Brady, it’s not something I’ve done before… and I wouldn’t know where to start.

I hope I won’t have to, but giving Mallory time to stop being so mad at me seemed like the best move.

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