Page 67 of Secrets at the Little Music Shop

‘There y’go then. But I will tell you this. We gotta get Saskia and Rosie away from each other.’

‘I’m all for that. She’s ruining Rosie’s life with her constant orders. Trouble is Saskia is her only customer now, she’s had to drop everyone else but because Saskia pays so well it’s all been fine. What would she do if Saskia did stop ordering?’

Jason shrugged. ‘She’d survive. Maybe the two of you could set up together?’

‘Great idea, but you’re missing the fact that eBay have still got me banned and the whole of York regards me as marginally less marketable than typhoid.’

‘It’ll straighten out. Now you’ve got Ben.’

‘I’m not going to be living off him, if that’s what you’re thinking.’ Even the thought of being financially dependent made my breath thicken in my throat. ‘I’ve got plans. Well, sort of. I’m planning to get Saskia to tell the Board of Trade members to start stocking me again and that’s a start.’

‘Just get Rosie out from under, Jem. Whatever it takes.’

I shook my head in the darkness, forcing my breathing to steady. In, out. Don’t panic. ‘I’ll do what I can.’

‘Great.’ We walked along elbow to elbow for a bit. Then Jason broke the silence. ‘I’m going back to the States in a couple of weeks. I need to know—.’ He cleared his throat. ‘I need to know Rosie’s okay before I go.’

‘Jase, you old dog, do you fancy our Rosie?’ I prodded him with a finger. ‘Why don’t you ask her to go with you? I’m sure she’d love to see New York and it would be great for Harry. Plus it would get her away from Saskia — I mean, her kind can’t cross water, can they?’

I stopped teasing suddenly. There was an expression that I’d never seen before on Jason’s handsome face. A kind of longing. ‘I would so love to do that.’ Even his voice was different, softer. ‘I asked her. But she wouldn’t come, Jem. She said, maybe one day, when she’s got stuff sorted . . . but I need to go now. Can’t stand around and watch — ach, still not my secret to tell.’

We both focused on the headlights approaching. Even before I could see the big silver car, I recognised its growl. ‘Here’s Ben.’

‘Yeah.’

‘Jason . . .’ But he’d already turned away and folded the darkness around himself like a blanket.

* * *

I climbed into the Audi but Ben didn’t immediately screech away from the kerb. ‘It’s lovely out here,’ he said, buzzing down the driver’s window. ‘Smells fresh. Like childhood.’

‘You are such a romantic, aren’t you?’

‘Never used to be, but, yeah. Maybe I am now.’ He opened the door and slid long legs out onto the kerb, the streetlamps strobing across his face and making him look like a manga character, all limbs, eyes and hair. ‘Let’s walk, Jem.’

‘What, back to York?’

I got a well-worn sort of look for that. ‘Romantic, remember? Just, around.’

I reluctantly climbed back out again and stood next to him on the pavement. ‘Dead romantic this. I’m sure I can smell tomcat-pee.’

‘Probably romantic if you’re a lady cat.’ An arm looped around my shoulders and he drew me into a slow walk. ‘It’s so quiet. Perfect place for a studio.’

‘A studio? What are you going to do, go into pornographic movies?’

‘Music studio.’ I gave him a look. ‘I’m going to write with Zafe. He’s the music man now but I’ve still got a shed-load of tunes in my head. New material for Willow Down, stuff for the new album — I dream it up and Zafe lays the track down. Plays it for the guys and if they like it, they’ll record. And they do like my stuff, least, they always used to, me and Zafe wrote most of the tracks on the last two albums.’ Ben looked down the street. ‘Wonder if that place is for sale?’

I looked at the impeccably raked gravel drive half-hidden behind the carefully trimmed yew hedge. ‘That’s Saskia’s place. You could make her an offer; I think she’d take you up on just about anything.’

‘Looks cool. Plenty of space.’

The moon made his eyes glow almost amber and his hair shone a tawny leonine shade. He was so clearly enjoying himself, scouting out locations for his future, I didn’t like to say anything which might bring him down, so I just held his hand as he walked closer.

We stood for a while in the shelter of the big hedge and Ben wrapped his arms around me. I had to admit it, it felt good, and I was content just to lean into him, feel him breathe and smell the expensive cologne that he used mingled with the scent of the night. There was a strength to him now, a certainty.

Could I do it? Could I trust him enough?

Gradually though I became aware that Ben’s attention wasn’t on me.

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