Page 45 of Secrets at the Little Music Shop

‘Whoa, come on. Look at how much experience I’ve got over our Jem,’ Jason complained. ‘Anyhow I don’t think she’s experienced at anything. Know wot I mean?’

I took the proffered Harry. ‘Still not a virgin, Jase.’ Knowing that he was trying to wind me up, to goad me into talking about myself.

‘Will be soon, if you don’t get cracking. You wanna borrow the batmobile to go looking for your man tomorrow?’ He shook his car keys in my face. ‘You can dart him through the window, crate him up, bring him back ’ere, no questions asked. I won’t even worry about any stains on the seats.’

‘Saskia’s coming over to pick up this first batch of cards.’ Rosie quite rightly ignored Jason. ‘They’re all packed up and ready to go. Right, I’m off, I’ll see you later.’

Jason and I stared at each other. ‘Your man not coming to pick you up?’ I asked as Harry wound his chubby little fists into my hair. ‘That’s a bit mean.’

‘No he — he has to work. I’m meeting him in town. Bus leaves in ten minutes. Bye!’

Rosie strode, high-heeled and preened, off towards the stop in the middle of the village and Jason gave me a jab in the arm.

‘You know wot? I reckon this bloke ain’t on the level. “Working” my arse, only bleeding married, in’t he?’

‘Rosie’s not stupid, Jase.’ I headed towards the cottage. ‘And she’s got Harry to think about. She’s not going to go shagging around with married guys with a three-month-old baby waiting at home, is she?’

‘She might,’ Jason answered, trotting alongside me. ‘If it was Harry’s dad.’

I stopped dead. ‘You think?’

‘Come on, Jem, don’t tell me you’ve never wondered? Think about it, if he’s available then why ain’t Rosie and he all cosied up in some kinda advert-idyll?’

‘Maybe they treasure their independence.’

‘Wot, like I used to treasure sleeping in the back of me car and dragging the whole of British Rail from place to place when I was trying to get commissioned? Yeah, that’ll be right, Jem. Rosie loves living here and working flat out for the Mistress of Pain.’

‘Talk of the devil . . .’

The huge black 4×4 was back, parking outside the cottage with Saskia in the passenger seat and Alex driving.

‘Hello, Jemima. And Harry. Gosh, a bare bottom, well, nappies are so expensive these days, aren’t they? Of course I used terries for Oscar, so much kinder to the skin.’

‘And so much harder on the au-pair. Hello, Saskia, Alex. No Oscar with you today?’ I jiggled Harry on my hip, the mere presence of Saskia made him grousy and the absence of his mother didn’t help.

‘He’s having a visiting day at his new school. Bless.’ Saskia tippytoed along the path towards Jason and me. ‘We’ve just passed Rosie at the bus stop and I must admit we were a little shocked at her dress sense, weren’t we, darling?’ As her husband caught up Saskia looped a hand through his arm. ‘Of course, I lost all my baby weight within a fortnight and not everyone can be so lucky, can they, but I do think one should dress for one’s shape.’ She eyed me up and down. ‘Obviously you don’t agree, Jemima, but it is important to look one’s best at all times. Now, are these the cards? I’m surprised that Rosie can find time to go off gallivanting when I told her I need the rest by the weekend.’

‘Surely you can be a bit flexible. I mean it’s not as if you’re even selling them . . .’

Whoops.

‘What do you mean?’ Saskia looked at me from under her eyelashes. Her suspiciously smooth forehead did its best to frown.

‘They aren’t in Le Petit Lapin, are they?’ Unless you count the fact that they’re stacked up in cardboard boxes out the back. ‘I looked.’

Saskia sighed. ‘Oh, but I did say I wanted these for the Harrogate shop.’

‘I could have sworn Rosie said these were for Le Petit Lapin.’ I gave Saskia my best smile.

‘No, darling. You’re not just the teeniest bit stressed, are you, Jemima? Only, stress can make you forgetful at times and you do look a little . . . how can I put it kindly?’

‘Unique?’

Saskia gave a chiming little giggle which was like tinfoil on my nerves. ‘Unkempt, sweetie. As though you’re not taking care of yourself properly. It’s so important to look after yourself. And how are you doing for money, darling?’

Pride cut in and I lied. ‘Oh, I’m doing okay. Ben’s shifting a fair bit of stuff and I’m selling well on the internet.’

‘That’s lovely.’ A tight smile, as though she was afraid to grin in case her mouth split. ‘Good. Now, we are just a teensy bit pushed for time, darlings, so we’ll take these and vamoose. Alex, sweetie, would you put the box in the car for me?’ As her husband hefted Rosie’s cards into the Hummer Saskia smiled sweetly at me. ‘And where’s that gorgeous Mr Davies, Jemima? I must say I’m surprised he’s not here, you looked so close at the opening.’

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