Page 36 of Sugar

Piper chuckled softly and cupped Juno’s cheek, brushing his thumb over his lower lip. “Here to pick me up for our date?”

“Except you’re driving,” Juno said, not quite bitter but not totally fine with that.

Piper’s expression softened. “I’m happy to. I actually love driving.”

Juno couldn’t tell if Piper was blowing smoke up his ass, but he decided he was going to take it. “Are you ready?”

“Unless you need to change.”

“I’m good.” Juno had done all of his cleaning in the days before, so there hadn’t been much for him to finish except a quick wipe of the counters and double-checking he hadn’t missed any spots. He draped his arms over Piper’s shoulders. “Let me show you a good time.”

Piper chuckled and swept in for another quick kiss. “I can’t wait.”

The drive to the beach was uneventful, and the parking wasn’t as bad as Juno thought it might be. Piper used a valet service at a nearby hotel, laughing as he took Juno’s hand and yanked him around the side of the building.

“Isn’t that cheating?” Juno demanded.

Piper shrugged. “I’m going to tip well.” He was still grinning as they hurried along the boardwalk three shops over until Juno spotted a small, beachy-looking restaurant with an open patio shaded by wood beams and off-white tarp.

Several of the tables were empty, so it only took a moment before they were seated in the corner with the perfect view of the water. Juno had lived there a long time, but he never got tired of looking out over the ocean.

And now, he realized his time with it was going to be limited.

He closed his eyes and listened to the waves hitting the shore.

“Want to put our toes in the water after we eat?” Piper asked.

Juno nodded. The grief wasn’t as profound in this moment. He opened his eyes and pulled his menu close. Piper had been right. It was bar fare. His eyes grazed over fried seafood, fish and chips, and a handful of salads, but his appetite just wasn’t there.

“Want to order for me?”

Piper reached for him, taking his hand carefully. “We don’t have to do this, you know.”

“I want to be here,” Juno told him. “I just…I don’t know. I’m struggling, and even making small decisions right now feels like trying to decide the fate of a small country.”

“Will it help if I take over?”

The answer to that had never been yes before. The very idea of letting anyone control his life used to make Juno sick to his stomach. But now? It was all he wanted. He understood why Miles had given himself to Emmett and Cosimo. They’d kept their dynamic quiet, but the weekend Juno spent with them, he noticed.

He saw the way Emmett ordered Miles around—a quiet command that was never, ever hurtful. He saw the way it made Miles relax. He’d never seen his friend so at ease before, and Juno realized he wanted some of that.

Maybe not the way Miles had it, but the very idea of having someone he could trust to take over when things were falling apart felt like a dream.

“If I’m crossing a line here…”

“You’re not,” Juno told him roughly.

Piper didn’t look convinced. He stood up from his seat and walked around the table, taking the empty seat beside Juno. “I have an idea.” Juno nodded, not sure where Piper was going. “Let’s skip dinner. We can walk on the beach, grab a pretzel or something if we feel snacky, and we can wait for the sunset. Then we can grab something on the way home so we don’t have dishes to do before we take off.”

Juno’s heart sank. That was exactly what he wanted right then, but that wasn’t a good thing. He wanted to be a better man. He wanted to show Piper he could give as well as take. “I’m fine.”

Piper laughed softly and cupped his face. “Sugar, you are not fine. I know what this trip means to you. I know what it means for you.”

Juno bowed his head, pulling away from Piper’s grasp, and he said nothing.

“I didn’t walk into this thinking it was going to be some careless road trip. You’re in mourning.”

“It’s just so ridiculous,” Juno said, louder than he’d planned to. He set his hands on the table to keep himself from clenching his fists. “I don’t even know if I’m going to lose vision in the other eye. This might be all for nothing.”

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