Page 164 of Ready to Cash Out

“Shouldn’t we wait for the authorities to get here?”

“Juicy! No!” Trev checked over himself for any injuries before hopping out of the car with a groan. He was definitely going to be sore later, but for now he was good to move. He had to be.

The accident was drawing too much attention.

People crowded the sidewalk and took pictures and video with their phones, though a select few came over to tend to those in the wrecked vehicles. Trev tried to wave at them and signal he and Juicy were fine, but he wasn’t sure how long that would keep any well-meaning Samaritans away.

Trev opened Juicy’s door. “Come on, we gotta go.”

“Where are we going?” Juicy blinked.

“Anywhere but here.” Trev took a deep breath. “We need to get back to Cold’s place as soon as we can so we can grab Jupiter and leave, okay? All of this is about to go down in one big giant pile of steaming shit and I do not want to explain a single fucking word of this to the cops!”

“We can’t flee the scene of an accident,” Juicy scolded.

Trev wanted to shake him. “We’re in a stolen car!” he hissed. “Get your ass up!”

“It’s not stolen! I bought this car twenty-three years ago! Runs great! Purrs like a kitten!”

“Okay, I didn’t want to have to do this.” Trev wasn’t even sure if it was going to work, but he had to get Juicy out of the damn car. “Come here, boy! Come here!”

Juicy narrowed his eyes. “What are you doing?”

Trev took a few steps back, patting his leg and looking down as if he was talking to a dog. “Hey! Such a good boy! Come here! Come here, Barkie!”

“Hey!” Juicy gasped. “No! Barkie, come here this instant!”

Trev mimed wrapping his arms around the imaginary dog and scooped him up, tucking him under his arm. He had no idea what kind of dog Barkie was supposed to be, but hopefully he was small enough that Juicy would buy this. “Nope. Me and Barkie are leaving.”

“Put my dog down!” Juicy shouted. “Thief! Help! Dog thief!”

“We’re gonna go get doggy ice cream, aren’t we?” Trev turned to walk away, cradling the imaginary dog and petting his head. “Say bye bye, Juicy!”

“It’s a good thing the police are on their way!” Juicy yelled as he came racing after Trev. “I will have them arrest you for dognapping!”

As soon as Juicy caught up, Trev slung his arm around his shoulders and squeezed him close. “Oh, hey! Juicy! Let’s take Barkie for a walk, huh?”

“A walk?”

“Yeah! A walk!” Trev passed over the imaginary dog and mimed handing Juicy a leash. “I bet there’s plenty of cool places around here for him to pee.”

“Oh! All right!” Juicy perked up, taking hold of the imaginary leash and falling into step beside Trev.

Trev could see that Juicy was bleeding from two small cuts on the side of his forehead. “Uh, how’s your head?”

“Mm?” Juicy shrugged. “Fine. How’s yours?”

“No complaints.”

“That’s nice. Hmm, I think Barkie wants to go this way.”

“You got it.” Trev was happy to follow the whims of the imaginary dog as long as said imaginary dog took them far away from the scene of the accident. He heard someone calling after them, but he kept them moving. There was no way they were sticking around to explain any of this to the cops.

Now here Trev was, wearing a bright pink shirt with no jacket to hide it because his jacket was currently in Juicy’s hand balled up on the side of his head. Juicy was in a hospital gown with nothing underneath, shamelessly charging forward as the open back flapped and revealed his bare ass for everyone to see, either not aware of his nudity or simply nor caring.

“Hey, why don’t we tie the jacket around your waist?” Trev suggested. “I think your head stopped bleeding.” He grunted as Juicy steered them sharply around a corner. “Juicy! Where the hell is Barkie going?”

“To the restaurant!” Juicy swatted at Trev’s attempts to help him. “He knows the way and I know what to do now. I’ve been there before.”

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