Page 38 of Bad Daddy

A week.

A week?

Clint ended the call with a silky, “I’ll see you soon, pet,” and Danny almost choked as he pulled the phone away from his ear, staring blindly down at the screen. The thought of spending a full week in Clint’s presence with no respite made him feel sick with dread. His stomach turned as his imagination conjured everything Clint might put him through, make him do. The thought of being at his total mercy for a week, a week of Clint getting creative–

And so much of his life would be upset by this too, fuck—work. He’d taken all those shifts for next week without stopping to think that Clint might want him exclusively. Stupid stupid. He might even get fired for this, might lose a job that had been good so far, and Danny had been watching his savings steadily climb with a shaky sort of pride, but if he lost Grand Azteca, there went Danny’s fantasy of actually being able to leave Clint behind for good, at least for the rest of the year—

The room started spinning as Danny clutched his phone and tried to breathe and not lose it in Haru’s kitchen. It was only when he heard a dim, “Danny? Danny, can you hear me?” that he registered he was no longer alone anymore.

He took in a big, unsteady gulp of air and did his best to focus. Haru was at the open entrance to the kitchen and looking at him with naked concern. Danny’s insides withered just that bit more.

“Danny?” Haru asked again, softly, as if worried he’d spook Danny. “Do you want to sit down on the couch?”

Danny nodded jerkily. Haru gave him a wide berth as they left the kitchen, sitting down on the very opposite end of the couch. Danny hated it, hated the distance. Just a few minutes ago things were comfortable and easy.

But Danny should have known. Things were never allowed to be easy for him.

The silence stretched.

“Is there anything I can do?” Haru asked quietly. “Some way I could help?”

Danny stared at his hands. He had tonight and Friday free, and then he was Clint’s for a week. Trading his body and whatever dignity he had left so that he continued to have a place to live and could pay for school in the desperate hope that he’d someday be in a better place.

“Danny…” Haru sounded like he was in pain, but Danny couldn't bring himself to look up. “If there’s something I can do, you–you know you can talk to me, right?”

It was the final straw that broke him. Haru was too good to him. Too good for him.

So Danny opened his mouth and ruined it.

“I’m with someone,” he said to his knees. He didn't dare a glance at Haru. “Kind of. But it’s not—I don’t—” he took a shuddering breath. Fuck, this was so hard. “But I don’t want to be with him anymore.”

Chapter 10

There was silence after Danny admitted that he had essentially been using Haru to cheat on the person he was currently with. They hadn’t even kissed or anything, Haru had never even touched Danny, but Danny knew it counted as emotional cheating. He had been greedy for Haru’s attention, soaking up every kind word, each gentle, interested question, and in doing so, he’d been leading Haru along for weeks.

Clint he didn't care about, but he’d been unfair to Haru in every way.

He was kind of glad now, that he hadn’t shown Haru the notebook full of comic pages that was sitting in Danny’s bag. It seemed so stupid now. Pointless and childish and stupid.

He brought up a hand to scrub over his eyes. Fuck. “I’m sorry,” Danny forced out, knowing it would never be enough. “I can–I can get a ride home and get out of your hair. I won’t bother you again.”

“Danny…” Haru sounded heartbroken, and when Danny managed to look up at him, because at least Haru deserved that much, the raw expression on Haru’s face made guilt burn like acid in Danny’s throat. He had done that. He had made Haru look like that.

“I’m sorry,” Danny whispered again, and the words got caught as he tried to say them.

He needed to make himself get up and leave, but he couldn't get his body to move. It felt leaden, weighed down with guilt and shame. There was also a tiny part of him that just… didn't want to go yet. It wanted to prolong this last moment with Haru, no matter how painful it was.

More greed, on Danny’s part, and he was so disgusted with himself by it that it finally propelled him to stand.

“Danny,” Haru said again, reaching out a hand. Danny froze, even though Haru wasn't close enough to touch. Haru never touched him. “Please don’t leave.”

“Why?” Danny spat, anger at himself spilling over into a barbed defense. “I already ruined everything, I-I proved just how worthless I am–”

“Don’t talk about yourself like that,” Haru snapped. The force of it was startling, though Haru softened his voice right away. “You’re not worthless. And I’m not—I’m not mad at you. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

A wretched, bitter laugh escaped him as Danny fell back onto the couch. No matter how much he should leave, Haru had asked him not to. Danny owed it to him to stay for whatever he wanted to say. “How can you even say that?”

Haru took a deep breath and let it out, shoulders straightening in a way that had Danny sitting up at attention too. “Because I’m pretty sure you’re not with your current… partner because you want to be. And… and sometimes people do things because they don’t have any other choice.”

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