Page 43 of Pike

“Maybe she likes it,” he says in return.

“She doesn’t. You’re hurtin’ her, Pike. Look at her face,” Free tells him as I wince. He’s not wrong. He is hurting me, but I wouldn’t change it for anything. I need to be here, just like Mask said.

Slowly, his hands loosen on my shoulders, and I let out a breath. Pike steps back and turns, heading back to the bathroom while Free looks at me.

“You okay?”

“I’m fine.”

“Don’t push him too far, Feather.” I nod my head as the guys turn and leave the room. Maybe it’s a smart move. Maybe it’s not. I have no protection from Pike if they aren’t in here. Somehow, that scares me a little, but I know Pike isn’t hurting me on purpose.

I slip my shirt off and then my jeans, walking into the bathroom, where I find him in the shower. I step in after taking off my bra and panties and rub his back.

“You want me to hurt you?”

“No.”

“Then stop, Feather. Stop now.” I ignore his words. I have to. I need him to know I’m here and I’m not going anywhere. I need him to trust me the way I trust him.

I don’t say anything; I just massage his shoulders and his back. I keep my hands moving over him when he spins around and grabs me once more. He shoves me against the wall of the shower and moves in closely.

“You’re makin’ a mistake, Jailbait. I can’t control myself right now. I’ve seen too much. Felt too much.”

“Feel me, Pike.” I’m begging. Begging he would listen to me. I push up on my toes and kiss him. I kiss him until he begins to kiss me back. I kiss him until I feel him slightly loosen up, and then I kiss him some more.

Chapter 21

Pike

What is she doing? What is she trying to do to me? She’s making me insane. She’s making me think, and I don’t like it. I don’t want to think. I don’t want to feel, and I sure as hell don’t want to fuck her. I’ll hurt her, and I know I will. So I pull back, pushing her away from me. Her small frame bounces off the tile of the shower before she flinches. Fuck. What am I doing to her? The only thing I know how to do. That’s what.

“Get out,” I order as I shut off the water and climb out. I grab a towel and wrap it around my waist as I stand in front of the mirror, looking at myself. What the fuck did they do to me? I let this happen. I should have stopped it. I should have taken his place. There are too many thoughts running through my head right now, and I can’t stop them. I reach up and pound my palm against my forehead when her hand comes to rest on mine.

“Don’t do that.”

“Don’t tell me what to do.”

“You’ll hurt yourself, Pike.”

“I deserve it,” I growl as I do it again, over and over, before balling up my fist and punching the mirror. Feather screams as blood drips down my knuckles. It was loud enough for the guys to come rushing back in to see what happened. They don’t say shit. Free looks at my hand, then the mirror, before shaking his head and turning and walking back out. The rest of them follow. They know I don’t need their shit right now.

“I want you outta here, Feather.”

“Don’t you get it? I don’t want to leave, Pike. I want to be here with you. For you.”

“And I want you gone.”

“What did I do?” she asks, her voice sounding broken. She didn’t do anything. Not a damn thing, but breathe. This is just all too much having her in my space right now.

“You didn’t do anything, Feather. I just … fuck I don’t know what I need right now.”

“Okay. Okay. I’ll go. But I’m not leaving, Pike. I’ll still be here for you.”

“Do you know what the hell I just went through?” I ask, turning to look at her now. “My friend, one of my best friends, stepped in and took it. They fuckin’ killed him, Feather. Beat him, stomped his fuckin’ head in while I was forced to watch! They killed him, Feather. And while I’m no stranger to death, this was different. This was personal. They wanted me to see what they could do, what they were capable of. And I fuckin’ watched every goddamn second of it!” I yell. Tears fall down her cheeks, and I’m torn. I want to grab her and hold her. I don’t want her to cry. I don’t want her to worry, but I know she is. The other part of me wants to push her away, shove her out of my mind so I can deal with the destruction the RRMC has caused. A fucking tear leaks down my cheek as her lips part.

“I won’t say I’m sorry, Pike. It means nothing. I’m here though. You can talk to me.”

“Talk? You think I wanna talk, Feather? I wanna talk to Rooster! I want him to walk through that fuckin’ door and tell me this was all a nightmare. That he didn’t really die tonight.”

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