Page 159 of Cruel Steps

CHAPTER

FORTY-SEVEN

EMERSON

Arriving on campus Monday morning, I wasn’t prepared for the chaos the campus turned into for Spirit Week. Posters of the candidate’s faces were plastered on every available surface. You couldn’t go two feet without running into something in Hayward school colors of teal, black, and magenta. Cody stood next to me at the first Spirit Week event, our mouths hanging open at the madness.

“I feel woefully unprepared,” I admitted.

“It’s because you’re not in Greek Life,” Jenny said, coming up next to me.

“How so?”

“This is the fourth week of activities we’ve already had this semester. Rush week, Pledge week, the Hayward/Crusher game, and now Spirit Week. We still have three more before the end of the year.”

“And they’re all like this?”

“For the most part. Everyone goes all out. It’s fierce competition to win the events, and then it ends with getting dressed up and having a killer party.”

“Sounds exhausting.”

Jenny shrugged. “It can be, but it’s fun, too.”

“Which one are you in?” I asked, looking at her pink shirt with Greek letters. I should probably learn them all.

“Chi Alpha Tau.”

“CAT?” Cody asked, his nose wrinkling.

“Yep,” Jenny smirked. I knew I was missing something, but I was too overwhelmed to ask.

“Any pointers on how to survive my first event?”

“Smile and have fun.”

“So nothing,” I teased, making her laugh.

“Stop hiding and join in. Not every part of Greek life is like the Zetas.”

At the mention of the Zetas, three girls—including the two who’d been in the bathroom—crossed in front of us. Their brows were narrowed, and their eyes scanned up and down over me. I smiled and waved, trying not to show any sign of weakness. They made me want to hide, but I wasn’t going to.

The invite for today said to dress in your best school spirit outfit. Holden had insisted on me wearing an old jersey of his. I’d made it into a crop top with a long-sleeved dance top under it since it was cold out. It also had a built-in bra, and left part of my belly on display. I had my hair in pigtails with pompoms sticking out, HC temporary tattoos on my cheeks, and bright pink lipstick. I had on the black dance pants we’d worn a few weeks ago and magenta sneakers. I was going for a hip-hop school spirit look. I’d worried about having my stomach on display, but considering it had taken us twice as long to leave for class this morning, I’d felt confident in my skin.

One look from them, and I wanted to cover it up.

Why did girls have to make other girls feel bad about their bodies? I’d never understood it. We should be rallying together and telling men to shove it when they made comments, not reinforcing the lies we were made to believe about what made someone beautiful.

Lifting my chin, I planted my hands on my hips and owned my outfit. My stomach might be softer than theirs, but it didn’t make it inferior.

“Good luck today,” I said before walking off with Cody and Jenny. As soon as we were a few feet away, they laughed. “What?”

“I love you,” Jenny said, wiping her eyes.

“Thanks?”

She dropped her arm over my shoulders. “You could be the bitchiest person, but you’re not. I love how down-to-earth you are. Add the fact that you’ve shaken up campus; I don’t hate having to attend here anymore.”

“You didn’t want to go here?”

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