Page 40 of Forever Ink

“Susan’s not.” I answered. Magnus and Grandad both looked at me with shocked faces.

“What do you mean she’s not locked up?” Grandad sat up straighter, glowering.

“Donald, umm, Constable Mathis, he came to see me this week. The Department of Public Prosecution said they didn’t have a case.” I ran my hand through my hair, feeling frustrated all over again.

“Does Simon know?” Magnus asked running a quieting hand down Ragnar’s flank as the ram started to bleat, annoyed at laying down.

“Yeah, um. He’s pretty worried.”

“That makes three of us,” Grandad muttered, shooting me a worried glance. “How are you feeling about it?”

I picked up a piece of straw and twirled it in my fingers. “First I was scared, and angry, so damn angry. But then the more I thought about it, I began to realise Susan is no threat to me. She and Dad hold no power over me. I—I almost pity her.”

Grandad’s eyebrows rose, nearly meeting his hairline. “Pity her?”

I shrugged, not sure how to explain how I felt. “What they did to me was wrong, and Dad is a bastard. He knew what he was doing was wrong but he kept doing it. He was a copper, he knew he was abusing me. Susan, I’m not making excuses, what she did to me was wrong and evil, but it’s how she was raised.” I shrugged, not sure if I was making myself clear. “I can’t forgive her for what she did to me, but I also can’t hold onto that anger. I don’t want them to still have that hold over me. I have my family now and a man I love more than I thought I ever could, and the amazing thing is he loves me back.” I slumped back into the straw.

Grandad looked at me thoughtfully for a moment and sighed. “When I heard that you had run away, I thought ‘finally my grandson will get some peace, live a happy and good life away from the bullshit and abuse my son thrived on.’”

“I hated leaving you, not leaving a message or at least telling you, but it all happened so fast.”

“Rhee, don’t apologise for that, you did what you had to, and I am a damn sight glad you did. Your mum and grandmother would be so happy that you found Simon, and that you have an amazing future ahead of you.” Grandad smiled softly. “You have a big heart just like your mum, and I understand what you’re saying. I’ll never forgive myself—or them—for what happened, but you are right. You can’t hold onto that anger, it’s the sort of thing that eats you up.”

I reached across the straw to grip Grandad’s weathered hand. “You didn’t do anything wrong. You helped me survive, you showed me love when nobody else would.”

Grandad pulled out his old hanky, blowing his nose loudly and huffing about getting soft in his old age. “And now you have Simon,” he said through a watery smile.

“I do, and I can’t explain how happy he makes me.” I was grinning like a clown, I knew it, but whenever I thought of Simon that was what happened, and that was how love was supposed to make you feel, right?

I leaned back against one of the hay bales and smiled at Grandad and Magnus. Grandad huffed out a laugh, his blue eyes twinkling. “Did the rings come?”

I could feel a blush rising on my cheeks and Magnus shot me a curious look “Oh aye? What’s this about then?”

I bit my bottom lip. “I’m going to ask Simon to marry me,” I said quickly as I heard the sound of the motorbikes coming into the yard. Magnus’s eyes grew wide and then a huge grin split his face.

“Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me. I couldn’t ask for a better son-in-law.”

I wanted to hug him at those words, but Ragnar decided he’d had enough of laying quietly and struggled to his feet, giving us all a sheepish glare. “Will he be all right?”

“Right as rain. I’ll keep him in the stall tonight and let him back with the girls tomorrow. Well, once I find out where the sneaky bastard’s getting out and patch the fence.” Magnus glared at Ragnar, who almost looked ashamed—that was, until he heard Simon’s voice. I swore his eyes narrowed in evil glee.

I stood, brushing straw from my legs and giving Ragnar another pat, “I’m going to, you know, with the rings tonight maybe, so no telling, okay?”

Magnus and Grandad both mimed zipping their lips which caused me to giggle as Simon and the guys walked in. Simon gave me a confused look until Ragnar snorted loudly and stomped his foot.

“I see Satan’s ram is feeling better.” Simon said with a hint of amusement in his voice. I noticed he kept the stall gate between him and Ragnar.

Opening the gate and making sure to keep my body between Ragnar and Simon, I slid out and went straight to my Daddy. I slid my hand into his.

“Come with me, need to get you in a shower.” He was covered from head to toe in mud and muck.

“Lead on, baby bear.” Simon let me drag him towards the house, passing a laughing Mouse and Callum, and through the kitchen and up the stairs to the large bathroom on the second floor.

“Okay, Daddy, you start stripping off. I’m going to find us some clean clothes.” I rushed off, leaving Simon laughing, to our room where I found fresh clothes for us both. I opted for comfy sweatpants and t-shirts as we were not heading outside again today.

When I got back to the bathroom, Daddy was sitting on the edge of the bath trying to pull his socks off, and it seemed they were fighting him. I didn’t do a very good job of stifling my laugh looking at him.

“Here, let me help.” I laid our clean clothes on the bathroom vanity. It was a change, me helping Daddy into the shower, and it felt good to be looking after him for once. I reached into the shower and got the water running. I was already in love with this shower, the whole bathroom was twice the size of ours back in the flat and had a separate bath and shower.

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