Page 97 of All Your Pucking Secrets

She focuses on me, her pupils back to a more normal size. “Better, thank you. But that doesn’t mean I forgive you.”

“I don’t expect you to.” My actions have been unforgivable. I hesitate, then add, “Would it bring you any comfort to know that Eric got the shit beaten out of him on his first day in prison, and that he was told it would be ten times worse if he ever tried to contact you?”

She shakes her head, although there’s something satisfied about the twist of her mouth. “This is too much at once. I can’t concentrate now. My mind is still spinning. I need to think.”

“Okay. Let me get you back to your dorm.”

But she shakes her head again. “Not you.”

Fuck. That shouldn’t hurt as much as it does.

I reach for her, then stop myself and curl my hands into fists.

Don’t touch. She doesn’t want that.

“If you never want to see me again, I get it, and I’ll disappear. That’s something I can do for you. But I want you to know that I don’t have any secrets from you now. I love you, and for me, there will never be anyone else.”

I’m hers, until I take my last breath.

She nods, the movement jerky. “I just…Do you want to know something I’ve never admitted to anyone?”

“Yes,” I say, although something in my tone warns me I might not like what I hear.

“The night it happened.” She draws in a deep breath. “The night Eric raped me. I’d been tutoring a junior in the school library after hours.”

“I know,” I whisper.

I forced myself to listen to her testimony in court. She doesn’t know I was there, but I had to hear it all for myself. I had to know how badly I’d failed her.

“I was crossing the car park when he attacked me from behind. I tried to fight back.”

I nod, my throat tight. I’ve seen the photographs of the cuts and bruises he gave her. The ring of finger-shaped smudges around her neck.

“I had no chance against him; especially after he knocked me unconscious. When I came to, he was already…”

A sob escapes her, and my fingernails embed themselves in my palms. I want so badly to reach for her.

“There was nothing I could do. But even as I lay there, I dreamed that you might turn up out of nowhere and save me. Now, to find out you egged him on—even if it wasn’t intentional… I don’t know how to deal with that.”

My heart is breaking for her, and I don’t even try to stop the tears that leak from the corners of my eyes. I hate to think of her so alone and scared, hoping for a hero when all I’ve ever been is her downfall.

“I’m sorry, Echo. So damn sorry.” It will never be enough.

She blinks rapidly. “I want to go home.”

“I’ll call Ryan and ask him to come and get you.” Since it’s clear she doesn’t want me taking her anywhere, and I don’t blame her.

“No.” She stiffens. “I’ll call Anita. But you don’t need to wait. I’ll be fine here.”

“Echo…”

“Go.”

With a heart weighed down by sorrow and regret, I stride away—but not far. I round a corner and duck behind a bush, shifting around until she’s back in view. She’s too vulnerable to be alone right now.

I wait in the shadows until her redheaded friend appears. She slings her arm around Echo’s shoulder and escorts her from the gardens. I watch her go, painfully aware that this might be the last time she walks away from me.

What will I do if she tells me to leave her alone for good?

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