Page 41 of Fire

This isn’t complicated. This is right. The way things always should have been.

If I hadn’t listened to my dad, Micah would have been there in a heartbeat. I know it. And these last years would have been filled with him calling my breasts perfect instead of Julian complaining about the stretch marks on my belly.

That man’s name is a bucket of ice water through my veins and I freeze. Micah lifts his head. “What’s wrong, Ives? This is happening too fast, isn’t it?”

“Maybe. Probably. But…” I can’t help myself; I grab his face and pull his lips to mine because this is the first time anything’s made sense. His kiss. His touch. The erection digging into my hip. I drag my hands down his muscular back and grip his ass, rolling my hips into his, desperate for friction.

Micah returns the kiss, and there’s a moment of neither of us caring about right and wrong and good and bad, but then he growls and pulls away.

“But what?” He brushes the hair from my face, staring down at me with so much tenderness, so much passion, so much desire…

It’s been a long time since a man’s looked at me like that.

I search for the words, but he’s kissing me again, like we create our own gravity, like we’ve been fighting its pull all this time and no longer have the strength to keep fighting. My fingers brush the skin just under his shirt and I draw my nails along his back. Goose bumps flare down his spine and he presses his forehead to mine to whisper, “I’ve missed you so fucking much.”

He kisses my neck, nibbles my jaw, captures my bottom lip between his teeth, and my brain short circuits. The correct response to his statement would be that I’ve missed him too, but I spent years hating him, but now, knowing what I do, I couldn’t hate him if I tried and I…

Jesus, Ivy! Stop thinking! Just enjoy something for once!

I yank Micah’s shirt over his head. It gets stuck around his shoulders, and he sits up to finish the deal. The lights are off, thank God—I don’t think I could do this if he could see me—but the hint of muscles flexing in the low light has me biting my lip. He’s delicious and I want to run my tongue over every inch of his definitely not Photoshopped chest and abs.

Micah lifts my shirt and I brace. Julian would survey my body, looking for faults, for flaws, for extra pounds to complain about. Even sex was an opportunity to put me in my place.

I instinctively cover my stomach, but Micah moves my hands away.

“Don’t hide from me, baby. You’re fucking gorgeous.”

His lips, his teeth, his tongue. They caress me, they unlock me, they leave me shivering with want and desire and I’ve forgotten how to feel good. Sex has been a means to an end, to Julian’s end, for so long and—

I wrap my legs around Micah’s hips, he pauses, breathing heavily. “Are you sure this is what you want?”

I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life, I think, but I’m not good at knowing what I want. Not anymore. Every cell in my body cries out for him, but how do I know I’m not in the middle of another chaotic decision?

Micah sits up. “Because you just said you didn’t think we should be doing this and what you want matters to me.”

I don’t want to complicate things but being with him doesn’t feel complicated at all. It feels easy. Natural. Right.

“What if this is just a one-time thing?” I ask, bargaining with myself as much as with him. “Just to ease the tension. Get everything out of our system so we can focus on being friends. I mean, we’ll always be more than friends. You’re you, you know? But…”

“Sure. Right.” Micah’s brows furrow. “I promised myself I’d keep this professional, but I know I won’t be able to. Not with all this pent up…you know. A one-time thing is exactly what we need.”

You’re exactly what I need, I think, though that has to be my libido talking. I can’t remember the last time I’ve been this turned on.

I grip his face and pull him close, hoping my kiss will say everything my voice can’t.

Micah undoes my pants, sliding them down my hips right along with my underwear, then spreads my legs, lowering his face to me, parting my cleft to do something magical with his tongue. I groan, slapping a hand over my mouth to keep quiet—

…do you have any idea how stupid you sound? whispers Julian’s voice.

—until Micah slips his fingers inside and I gasp, pushing up on my elbows, eyes wide, desperate to see him. Those dark eyes meet mine as he sucks my clit into his mouth and that’s it. I’m done for. Starbursts and sunshine and my body is ecstasy, my cells glowing with pleasure and oh my God I hope this feeling never stops. My legs quiver. My belly trembles. I bite my lip so hard to keep from screaming and then he sits back, smiling, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

“You taste so sweet. It’s like you’re made for me.”

His erection strains against his shorts and suddenly I’m eager to return the favor. I sit up, working the belt with shaky hands. The metal clinks in the darkness as I undo the clasp, then go straight for the button on his shorts, impatient to have him inside me.

He cups my cheek. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed this face.” He kisses me. “These lips.” His fingers skate along my waist. “You have no idea how much I want you.”

“That doesn’t sound like something friends would say to each other.”