Page 104 of Peppermint Bark

Grace

“If it was so long ago … why are you telling me this now?”

“Because Mallory is useless when it comes to heartbreak. Her best advice is always that the best way to get over a man is to get under another. You need somebody who gets it.”

“I …” and then the tequila pushed the confession out. “I didn’t think you liked me.”

“I didn’t at first,” she said plainly, and I winced at her honesty. “I thought you were honing in on my best friend. But I came around, because Mallory is an excellent judge of character,” she gestured between us. “And because that’s what girlfriends are for: Pedicures, text memes, and picking up the pieces of each other’s broken hearts when men are giant idiots.” She laughed. “And having conversations that pass the Bechdel test. Just not tonight.”

Then she picked up her phone. “Now I’m gonna call Paul to pick my wasted ass up. He’s not the Sexiest Man Alive …” Kate made sarcastic jazz hands as her mouth turned up wryly, “but he runs a great drunk bus.”

Chapter 36

Grace

One Week Later

“Hey, Grace, got a minute?” Jean asked as she knocked on my office door. I’d thrown myself back into work all week, trying to feel normal again after that whirlwind month by burying myself in patient charts and reporting to block out the loneliness and regret.

It was going to start working any minute now.

I waved her in, chest tightening with worry. “Is Ruby ok?”

“Routine tests. She’s ranking her favorite ponies for the nurse, so I’ve got a few hours. Days, if she moves onto zoo animals,” she said with a half-hearted smile as she handed me Helen’s borrowed blanket and a small gift bag.

I pulled out a double picture frame: On the left side was a grinning Ruby with an arm around both Santa and Mrs. Claus’s necks. On the right side was Alex kissing me under the mistletoe, his hand delicately placed on my waist and a crinkle in his eyes, the surprise evident in my stiff posture. My heart leaped into my throat as I croaked out my thanks and placed the frame next to my computer monitor, trying not to let my face betray my heartbreak. Based on Jean’s averted eyes, I was failing.

“I’ve got news,” she said, her tone bittersweet. “They found Ruby’s dad.”

“And?” I said with all the enthusiasm I could muster as dread pooled my gut. If her dad took her, she’d probably move to New York City and restart her life; if he wasn’t interested or qualified, she’d go to a foster home.

“Deadbeat, like Sarah said,” she sighed, slumping in the chair. “Not interested in taking her.”

“So she’s going into foster care,” I said, trying to keep my voice neutral. Jean picked at the lint on her sweater. “You’ve done a great job, giving her stability this month. And you’ll still be involved her life.”

“I know, Grace, but …” she blinked back tears and fidgeted with her necklace, her thumb rubbing along the smooth metal. “I hate not knowing who she’ll be with, whether they’ll know about her heart. She’s such a loving girl, I’d hate to see her sweetness get lost in the shuffle. I know it’s not up to me, but I wish I could hand pick her next mom.”

An idea formed in my mind, spinning with my mother’s voice: “Build houses, plant gardens. Have daughters and sons.”

I gripped my armrest and summoned the courage to speak, then blurted it out with unexpected confidence …

“I could be Ruby’s mom.”

Then I could see it, the future as open and bright as the blank calendar on my office wall: eating breakfast together, pushing her on a swing at the park, helping her with homework, tucking her into bed. Watching her grow up.

Being there for her, like I told her mom I would.

Jean’s intake of breath was so intense it felt like she stole mine. Her head shook slowly, but I recognized it as disbelief, not rejection.

“I love her, Jean,” I smiled softly, the realization warming my gut.

“Grace, taking care of Ruby, with her heart condition, it’s …” Her voice cracked and tears misted her eyes.

“I already know, and I know all her doctors. I could do it, I know I could.”

Jean’s smile widened, joy warming her face. The same joy I felt in my heart. “Grace, if you’re serious about this …”

“I’ve never been more serious in my life.” I considered going down on my knees, but just met her eyes imploringly. “I already love her, and I’ve always wanted to be a mom but didn’t see how it was possible.”

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