Page 102 of Peppermint Bark

I found myself longing for the warmth of Grace’s homemade blanket over the sofa and her extensive plant collection, and started dreaming about the future townhouse I’d seen in the dream this morning — had it only been this morning? I’d always wanted a family, and I couldn’t do that in this apartment.

“Oh fuck, what’s that face mean?” Victoria scowled.

I shrugged, still considering a house with a yard. “Thinking about the future.”

“The only future you should be thinking about is what the partners are going to say tomorrow,” she said with a pointed glare, then held up two pints of nonfat frozen yogurt. I pointed to the chocolate, wishing it was rocky road. She lobbed it underhand and I ate it straight from the carton.

“I ordered a gluten free pizza too.” Connor emerged and handed me my credit card. Good thing Victoria and I shared an incredible assistant, because I’d forgotten she couldn't eat wheat.

While we waited for pizza delivery, I carried the pint to the couch and scrolled to The Princess Bride. “Don’t judge me.”

“Are you kidding? I love this movie,” Victoria asked, settling into my chair. “Inigo Montoya became a master swordsman exclusively for vengeance. Nothing but respect for that level of commitment.”

“Plus you have a thing for guys who speak Spanish,” Connor teased.

Victoria's neck flushed pink. “Shut up and press play."

Grace

“You fell in love with Nick? And Mallory doesn’t know?” I screeched.

Kate poured us another shot. Even though I would regret every ounce, she’d been right: this conversation required hard liquor.

“You think she freaked out about Alex? Imagine the reaction of nineteen-year-old Mallory, before she started meditating and doing yoga. She would have lost her fucking mind.”

“But wait,” I said, struggling to pull the strands together. “She said you kissed.”

“She knows we kissed when I was 17. That's all she knows. He moved to New York when I was 19, for Shakespeare in the Park. Mal was about two years into nomadically traveling the world.”

“Her version of Eat-Pray-Love, right?”

“Yeah, but she called it Drink-Chant-Fuck.”

I laughed, not sure if it was the wine or the tequila or just … Mallory.

“Nick wanted to tell his whole family that we were together, but I resisted. When it was just the two of us, it was perfect. I was afraid telling people would shatter our perfect bubble. It was like time stopped for a summer of infinite bliss,” she sighed. “But summer can’t last forever, can it?”

I lifted my glass to salute the inevitable march of time. "What happened?"

“When he landed The Twelve, he expected me to drop out of school and go with him.” Her face crumpled. "It destroyed me to walk away."

I poured another shot. She flicked her fingers in a ‘bring it on’ gesture.

If Kate could be brave and honest, so could I. We tapped our glasses before I confessed, “This morning, Alex begged me to move to San Francisco.”

“He what? He’s known you a month!” Kate screamed. She started laughing then, dark and rough. “What an asshole! What’d you say?”

“I told him I couldn’t start over again. Not if he …” My throat closed up, my body unable to relive that conversation.

“Let me guess,” Kate clapped her hand on my shoulder. “The prick made it all about his career, and you could win Best Supporting Actress for your role in it?” She read the answer on my face, then shook her head. “Those Clarke men. So charming, so smart, so fucking hot … and so goddamn oblivious the world doesn’t revolve around them.”

She sighed, picking at the strings of mozzarella on her plate. “A month before my dad died, I told him about Nick. It felt like going to Confession, bearing my sins and asking for absolution. Do you know what he told me?”

A playful glint shone in her glassy eyes when she said in Italian, “Finché c’è vita, c’è speranza. As long as there’s life, there’s hope.” Then she sucked a tooth and added, “Then again, when I was 15 I found him in bed with my French teacher, so maybe he’s not the best source of wisdom.”

My head swam at her confession. “Do you ever think about what it would have been like, to take a leap of faith and go with him?”

“I used to, every hour of every day. But now … now I only doubt my life decisions two, maybe three times a day.” She grinned wryly. “Questioning your choice already?”

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