Page 54 of SALT

Everett: Drinks tomorrow. My place.

Now that I'm home, visitors are the last thing I need tomorrow. Today was a nightmare from start to finish. I didn't want to leave Cameron the way I did this morning. I wanted to follow after her and demand that she hear me out, but I had to get on the road so that I was on time for the game. These games are a big deal for Connor and the organization he's built, and Lauren informed me last night that she knew of one scout that would for sure be at today's game. That's one potential placement for one of my guys.

When I turned the corner, I saw Lauren hand Cameron her phone, and as I backed out of the driveway rather than sit outside her door, I hoped when she calmed down and found the time to read my messages, she'd see that I tried. That I did, in fact, tell her about Lauren and hadn't set out to hurt her, and then the game happened. If there had ever been a day to start putting weight in synchronicity, today would have been it. As though the morning wasn't enough of a sign to stay away from Cameron Salt, the game this afternoon should have been. She's been the source of my torment since I got home, but watching Parker run to her, spin her around, and grab her ass before putting his mouth on hers only confirmed I am a glutton for punishment. I'd like to say I could walk away, that I could let her go, but that would be a lie. If it weren't, I wouldn't have stormed across the field this afternoon. Did I want to tear into Parker for his stunt on the mound? Yes, but my desire to kill him for touching what feels like mine was greater. It was she who pulled me across that field, not self-serving vengeance for him trying to pull rank over me. Which he'll more than pay for. Time and time again, it's her. It will always be her. It's been her for longer than I'll ever admit. I've noticed her because my soul always saw its other half. It just looked different before, but I'm good at pushing aside what I want. Shoving down my own desires is what I excel at. It's why I popped a sleeping pill before getting into this scalding hot shower in hopes of actually staying in my room.

We didn't talk on the drive home this afternoon, even though I had a million words. I couldn't. I was torn between yelling at her and pulling over on the side of the road and giving her every fantasy I've had since I watched her play with her pretty pussy. Neither option would have been appropriate, and I'm tired of saying and doing things with her that I fucking regret. If I touch her again, it won't be from a place of anger. She didn't attempt to speak either; I think she was emotionally drained like me. Not speaking to the only person you want to talk to is hard. Not kissing away the insanity is harder. But that's not us. We're not in a relationship. I can't kiss away madness or spend hours in the sheets correcting her bratty behavior because she's not mine. Not in the way I want her to be.

I shut off the shower and quickly dry my hair before heading to bed. The pill I took must be kicking in because my brain is muddled. Nothing makes sense right now; there is no reason to be awake. Nothing good can come from staying awake. That's the last thought I have before sedative-induced sleep takes me.

My eyes jolt open, but my body doesn't move as my ears are acutely attuned to the deafening silence cloaking my room. I'm sure I heard something. What else could have woken me from deep sleep? I know it's not my thoughts; for once they are quiet. It's then I remember why I quit taking sleeping pills years ago. They make me groggy.

As my eyes lazily open and close, my mind drifts in and out of a dream state, and I convince myself that am indeed hearing noises. Nothing is real right now. The alarm is on, and Cameron is down the hall, safely sleeping in her bed. Miraculously, reassurances of her safety start to lull me back into a slumber until the bed dips beside me. I force my heavy lids open once more. Exhaustion from my lack of sleep over the past weeks has finally caught up with me, and now I'm hallucinating, or at least I thought I was. Until heat from a warm body envelops my back and the sweet scent of roses hits my nose.

"Cam—" I attempt to say her full name, but the weight of my tongue prevents me from doing so.

It doesn't matter anyway because my question is answered when lips press against my shoulder. "Are you expecting someone else?"

My heart starts galloping. This can't be happening. Of all the nights she could have decided to come to my bed, she has chosen this one. Finding my strength, I roll over. "Cameron, you can't be in my bed," I say sternly before my eyes land on her very exposed breasts, and I slam them shut. If I thought my heart was galloping before, it's full-on fucking sprinting now.

"Closing your eyes isn't going to make me disappear. I'm done slamming doors. I'm done not saying everything I want to say because I'm too scared to cross a line. I'm done walking away, believing it could be the last time, the one that pushes us to the point of no return, because the truth is, what scares me the most is never feeling again the way I feel when I'm with you."

Her words feel like they are literally ripped from my heart. Doesn't that mean something? Doesn't that mean this can't be wrong? How often do you find someone who can read the invisible ink on your soul? I've lived twice as long as her, and I can say she's the first. If she is my sin and my sin is my death, I will gladly die for her. My arm darts out, and I pull her naked body flush against mine, catching her off guard and making her gasp. God, she feels good. My head drops to the crook of her neck, and I inhale deeply, scared to open my eyes, fearful of changing my mind.

"Cameron… I don't want to let you go. You have to know that by now, but this… things will never be the same."

"Swear it."

"What?" I pull back and search her eyes for meaning.

"Swear things will never be the same because I don't want to go back. I only want to go forward. The only future I want includes you." Her hand comes up and caresses the side of my face. "I want you like this."

My mouth crashes to hers as my entire body hums with electricity. I've never felt more complete than I do right now, pressed against her skin to skin. My tongue dives deep the way I wanted to in my office as I drape my leg over her body, pulling her impossibly closer. Her hand slips around my neck and her fingers rake through my hair at the base, making every strand on my body stand at attention. Fuck, I'm only kissing her, and it's already everything.

I release her mouth, desperate to explore every inch of her. My lips trail across her jaw as my hand slides down her back, where I grab her bare ass hard. I'm extremely turned on and borderline pissed off that I'm only just now allowing myself this. Somehow time was stolen from me because it doesn't seem fair that I had to wait this long to find her. To have her.

"Ev," she pants as she grinds herself against my hard length.

I instantly roll her onto her back and settle between her legs, pinning my cock firmly against her slick core. "Is this what you want, sunshine?" I hover above her, our eyes locked as I run my tip through her folds.

"You have no idea how bad."

I drop down to my forearms. "You're wrong. I've wanted it just as badly, for probably just as long." I press myself against her hard. When her pretty mouth pops open, I steal a kiss, dipping my tongue in softly before pulling back and biting her lip. "Too bad you'll have to wait a little longer."

"What?" ardently rolls off her lips.

"I've wanted to taste you," I say as I pepper open-mouthed kisses down her chest before cupping one of her perfect tits and sucking her nipple into my mouth.

"Mmm," she moans loudly as her hips buck against my torso. I bite and tease her nipple, admiring how hard it gets for me before releasing it and thoroughly ravishing the other. With both nipples pert, I drag my tongue down the center of her soft stomach, peering up at her beautiful face framed by her perky tits, the ones I just had in my mouth. When I reach her pubic bone, her eyes find mine, and for the first time in my life, I don't look away. I've always looked away during sex. Sex has only ever been a carnal urge, a craving that needed to be satisfied, but not now. Now it's different. I'm vulnerable; I'm trusting her with something—something deep that comes from a place I'm not familiar with—but I know I never want to leave. As I dip my head, I place a closed-mouth kiss on her lips, my eyes never straying from hers before I run my tongue straight up her center. Her legs quiver as a whimper escapes her throat. "This can't be real. It feels too good, and you've barely touched me."

I loop my arms around her thighs. "Sunshine, in the morning, there will be no mistaking where I've been." Then I pull her flush against my face, my tongue spearing her tight pussy as my eyes roll back. Fuck. Her hand fists into my hair as I dip in as far as I can, desperate to taste her and make her feel good. The way her tight walls flutter around my tongue tells me she's not going to last. She's too worked up; like me, she's wanted this for far longer than this moment. I flatten my tongue and lick her straight up her center until I reach her tight little bundle of nerves and suck hard.

"Oh god… fuck." Her fingers tighten in my hair as she grinds her pussy against my face, chasing her orgasm.

"That's it, come on my face, sunshine," I say before spearing her with my tongue once more.

"Ev," she pants right before her orgasm hits, and her legs tremble. Her juices coat my tongue, and I greedily lap them up, so fucking turned on that they exist because of me. Once I've cleaned up my mess, I crawl up her body and take her pretty mouth long and slow. She came fast, but I don't want to rush through this with her. You only have your first time once. She pulls away from my mouth, her hand finding my jaw. "I want you inside of me. Please tell me that's on the table."

The second I made the conscious decision to pull her naked body flush against mine, it was on the damn table, but I need to be sure this isn't just years of pent-up of sexual tension. "Are you sure you won't regret this in the morning?"

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