Page 62 of Disturbed Lucidity

Pacing up and down the hall, I nibbled on my thumbnail, thinking how big of a mistake this was. Though Gunny and Logic did have a point. How was I supposed to know anything unless I asked? I mean, it wasn’t hard. All I had to do was knock on the door and just ask him. What’s the worst thing he could say... no. Not that I thought he would. It was just that I’d never had to ask before. Usually, the men just took what they wanted. I never had to be the one to initiate before.

I was walking into uncharted territory.

What if I couldn’t get the words out?

I’d look like a fool.

“Ivy,” Gunny whispered loudly, his head peeking around the corner of the wall like a whack-a-mole. If I wasn’t so nervous, I would have laughed.

Frantically waving him away, I continued pacing when I heard Logic ask, “What’s going on?”

“Ivy’s gonna talk with Luc.”

“Really? How did you change her mind?”

“Sure as hell didn’t use none of those fancy words you use, that’s for sure. Gotta speak plain with my girl.”

“She looks nervous,” Saint added, walking over to them.

“My girl ain’t nervous. Go away, you’re freaking her out.”

“What’s going on?” Slash asked, joining the comedic group.

“Shush!” Gunny glared at them before pointing at me, then the door firmly.

“I can’t do anything with all you standing there, staring at me. Go away.”

The door to Luc’s office opened, stopping me in my tracks, as Gina walked out, adjusting her top. Seeing me, she smiled, then slowly wiped her bottom lip with her thumb and winked. Held head high, she sauntered away, chuckling while I just stood there, unmoving.

“Ivy?” I vaguely heard Luc say my name.

Slowly turning toward his voice, I saw him standing in the doorway, looking at me confused. I tried to shut out the thunderous roar in my head, and I clenched my hands tightly.

“Did you need something?”

Blinking, I sneered at the son of a bitch, “I don’t need anything from you. Ever!”

Chapter Eighteen

Ivy

“Men are assholes,” London, Anne’s sister said as she looked up at me from the floor, playing with her niece.

“London, it’s time for Katiya’s bath,” Anne spoke, walking into the room, handing me an ice-cold lemonade.

Despite her audible sigh, the young woman followed Anne’s instructions and tenderly lifted the little girl before making her way out of the room.

I didn’t know where else to go after I left the club. Going to my apartment was a no-no; Slash would undoubtedly start his search there. With the homeless encampment also out of the question, I quickly dialed Anne’s number for assistance. The sweet woman didn’t think twice before inviting me over to her place, and when I arrived, she was waiting on the porch with her arms wide open as I ran into them.

“I’m sorry, Anne,” I said, my tone filled with genuine regret while she took a seat next to me on the couch. I muttered under my breath, “I didn’t know who else to call.”

“I told you before that if you ever wanted to talk, I would listen. So, do you want to tell me what happened?”

“It’s a long story.”

“It generally is. I’ve got all night. So, talk.”

“I don’t know where to start,” I whispered, looking at my hands. “I’ve never had a girlfriend before. I don’t know what to do.”

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