Page 9 of Beautifully Devoted

Oh my God. I just imagined getting fucked by a guy. This rabbit hole goes way deeper than expected. Does this mean I like guys now? Or dicks? How do I test that?

The leg under my head shifts as Cam contorts his body like he’s evading the tackle instead of the guy on the screen, and a lightbulb appears over my head. Or it would’ve if I was a cartoon character.

“Cam?”

“Yeah?”

“Lemme see your dick.”

The room goes eerily silent as Cam pauses his game. “What?” He chokes back a cough. “Why?”

I rest my phone on my stomach and tilt my head back so I can see his face. “I want to see if it does anything for me.”

His jaw is set firmly as he asks, “Why would my dick do anything for you?”

“Not yours specifically, in general. I want to see if I like dicks.”

“You don’t know?” His brows draw together as he glances down to where my head is still resting on his leg.

“You do?” Mine lift up my forehead.

“Yeah.”

“Yeah, you know or yeah you like ‘em?”

“I like ‘em.”

I bolt up and spin on the couch so I can see his eyes. “You what?”

He lifts a shoulder like ‘yeah I said it.’

“Since when?”

“Ninth grade. Jonah Colson got a handy in the seat across from me on the bus one afternoon, and when he whipped that sucker out, all long and hard and shit…damn.” He bites his lip in a lame attempt to stop himself from smiling wistfully, which I’d find amusing if it weren’t for the fact that I’d never heard about this before.

“How do I not know this about you?” I demand.

“I never said anything.”

“And why not?”

“It’s not exactly the kind of thing you share for no reason.”

“Why do you need a reason to tell me anything? I’m your best friend.”

“My straight best friend. You really want to hear about how I like dick?” Cam calls me out by arching a brow.

“You really want to believe I can’t handle talking about dicks? You listen to me talking about pussy.”

“I like that too, so… It’s not really a hardship.”

“You’re missing the point, asshole. We tell each other everything, no exceptions.”

I must be glaring pretty good since he ducks his head with a little, “Okay.”

“Okay,” I huff, still a little miffed by the secret he’s been keeping for six years. “Anything you want to share? Have you hooked up with a guy?”

“No.”

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