Page 84 of Beautifully Devoted

“Yeah?”

I take a deep breath and turn my head to face him. “Since you’re pretty determined to believe I shit rainbows and all, I figure it won’t freak you out if I tell you I love you.”

His rich brown eyes calm my pounding heart when they find mine. “I love you, too.”

Did I hear that right? “No, I mean like… I love you. Hearts and forever and soulmate type love.”

“Good, because that’s how I love you.” The corner of his lips pull up in a bashful, borderline endearing smile, and like a magnet it pulls mine up as well.

“Promise?” Jesus, I sound like a kid on Christmas morning.

“I promise.” He leans forward and presses his lips to mine in a kiss that’s so sweet I swear my insides feel like mush. “Now eat your sandwich. Freak outs burn a lot of energy, and we won’t get to skip practice again tomorrow, so you need your strength.”

The grin on my face is so broad, my face actually hurts, but I sort of don’t care that it probably makes me look ridiculous. “Yes Camelo—shit,” I hiss as his face falls. Who knew my mood could plummet so fast. “I called you that earlier too. Sorry, I know you hate it.”

“It’s okay. You were scared and stressed, and you haven’t come up with a new one for me yet. Besides,” he tries to make me feel better. “I don’t hate it, I just…don’t see how it fits me since it’s an English name and I’m Scottish.”

“I don’t call you Camelot after the English city,” I confess the secret I’ve kept nearly my whole life. The one that’s both an admission of how weak I am and how strong Cam is. “I call you that because it’s where the knights of the round table are from, and you’ve always been my knight.”

Cam’s jaw bobs up and down in stunned silence as he tries to blink the glassy sheen away from his soulful brown eyes. “Baby,” he sputters when he finds his voice. “Why didn’t you ever tell me that?”

“Baby? Nope. No way.” I rock my head back and forth on the pillow. “You already gave me a ridiculous name and you only get one.”

“Kittycat was ridiculous. Kitcat is clever.” His proud smile turns sultry. “But baby is sexy.”

“I’m serious,” I warn. “Call me baby and I won’t let you play with my dick.”

“You can play with mine then.” He thinks he has the upper hand since I’m now a devotee to the beast between his legs, but I’m willing to die on this hill.

“There won’t be any playing with dicks if you call me baby.”

“Babe?”

“No.”

“Beautiful?”

“Eew.” I roll my eyes.

“You are though.” Cam’s bashful smile is back. “So beautiful I still can’t believe you’d slum it with me.”

“That’s another thing that’s gonna make me take away your dick privileges. Never call me some sappy nickname and never imply you aren’t hot enough for me. You turned me gay, for God’s sake, you’re clearly gorgeous if I get harder for you than I do for pussy.”

“You’re gay now?” Cam tilts his head to the side above me.

“For you, I am,” I huff, though my agitation fades the instant I see his features soften. “You’re it for me, Camelot.”

That glassy sheen comes back to his eyes. “Seriously, how come you let me believe Camelot was a play on my name and not something personal?”

Even though this is Cam, it’s still hard to get the words out. “As much as I loved having you to protect me, it was sort of embarrassing that I couldn’t protect myself.”

“Kitcat.” He brushes a stray lock of hair away from my forehead. “You’re not this feeble, helpless guy you paint yourself as. You’re physically strong, you’re smart, you’re loyal to your friends and teammates, and even though you’re afraid of being like your dad, I think deep down you know you aren’t. You don’t need me to protect you, either. I think you let me do it because you know it gives me purpose. And even if some part of you does need help now and then, that doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human.”

Now it’s my eyes that feel wet. “I give you purpose?”

“You’re it for me too, Kitcat. You’re my only purpose.”

Damn, and here I thought it couldn’t get more intense than ‘I love you.’

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