Page 29 of The Very First Night

My gaze flits around the room, searching for a way to steer the conversation away from the uncomfortable topic. “What are you doing next weekend?” I ask as I close my textbook.

“Next weekend is Halloween, so I guess I’ll be doing that. Why?”

“Halloween is my twenty-first birthday!” I grin from ear to ear. Although I’ve had a fake ID since I was eighteen, I can’t hide my excitement at the day finally arriving.

“Your birthday is on Halloween?” He raises a brow.

I laugh. “Yes?”

“I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who has a Halloween birthday—it’s kind of cool,” Elijah says.

“It’s no less likely than the other 365 days in a year.”

“Yeah, but still. It’s cool.”

We grow quiet again, but it doesn’t feel nearly as tense as before.

Elijah leans forward, grazing my thigh in the process. “I’m sorry about that. I didn’t mean to get short with you about my dad. He just…that’s what most people want from me, and while I know that isn’t you, it still causes me to tense up.”

“I understand,” I say. And I do.

When people ask about my dad, I have a similar response. Sometimes there are more tears, but a pretty similar response nonetheless. No one wants to be asked about their parents all the time, whether that be because their dad left or because their dad just so happens to be the governor.

Elijah reaches over and squeezes my hand under the table with welcome warmth. “What were you thinking for your birthday?” he asks.

I shrug. “Jenna was talking about doing something at Marcus’s apartment.”

Elijah nods as though deep in thought, but whatever is crossing his mind, he doesn’t share. As if he can hear my thoughts—the cogs turning, the whistles blowing—he grins unabashedly. “I’ll be there.”

And suddenly any concerns or fears I had before melt away, leaving just the two of us.

Exactly the way I want it to be.

THIRTEEN

KAT

The fall semester rushes by at an alarming pace, leaving me feeling unsteady and unprepared. It’s like trying to hold onto water as it slips through my fingers, rendering me ill-equipped and out of control. Is this how the rest of college is going to be? A blur of passing moments I can’t seem to hold onto?

But then, as winter creeps in and the first snowflakes start to fall, I begin to understand that perhaps this is the way it’s meant to be. College is not meant to be savored and drawn out—it’s meant to be a wild and exhilarating ride. The moments may be fleeting, but they are full of adventure and growth. As I embrace this realization, I realize I’m ready to let go of my expectations and simply enjoy the journey ahead.

My birthday passes pretty uneventfully. We get together at Marcus’s apartment, just our small group of friends. Elijah shows up late due to something going wrong at the house before he left—or at least that’s what he said. I try not to be dramatic about it, but I can’t shake the fact that it effectively ruined my night.

Escaping the winter chill, I stamp my feet and rub my hands together as I enter the warm coffee shop. My body is still adjusting to the sudden drop in temperature, and my teeth chatter uncontrollably. The crispness of the first snowfall lingers on my skin and clothes.

“I’ll have a hazelnut latte with whole milk, please,” I say at the counter.

The barista puts my order into the register before holding her hand out to request my card. I hand her my payment and she takes it without a word, no doubt irritated by the now-full shop, everyone having the same idea to get out of the freezing late-November air.

“Your order will be up over there,” she says shortly. No indication of when; simply…over there.

I walk over to the mob of people huddled around the pickup counter.

“Hey, Just Kat!”

I turn around to see Tanner, whose eyes are filled with delight as he peers down at me.

“Hey!” I grin.

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