Page 24 of The Forbidden

My conflicted feelings make my stomach roll. How easy it is for Gabe to grant respect to Sylvie, Ethan and the Blackburn name. Gone is the ire for our family and the shame in having a connection to it. He gives it so willingly to Sylvie and yet denied it all to me.

I’m not selfish enough to try to refute that this is an apples-and-oranges situation. He and I were barely nineteen, trying to navigate this ages-old feud between our families. Now Gabe is older, more mature.

Sylvie is also his blood, the closest tie he has to his beloved sister. He’d gladly give his niece the world. I wasn’t even quite his girlfriend. More of an infatuation if I had to put a label on what we had.

At least, that’s how I felt in the end. The same old arguments took up the precious moments we had to steal to be together.

“Gabe, we can’t keep hiding. Let’s tell our families.” That was my mantra. My most fervent wish.

His was radically different. “Kat, you know we can’t. It’ll be a disaster. Do you think our families will just accept this? It’ll reignite everything.”

Over and over again, the same old words. The same wishes and denials. And yet, I couldn’t walk away from him. My heart was involved and I was sure, deep down, his was right along with me. That when it truly mattered, Gabe would be brave enough to step under the microscope of our families’ scrutiny and we’d both force them to accept that the feud was ending with us.

It didn’t work out that way and even after eight years apart and plenty of moving on, I’m still as bitter and resentful as I was back then.

I was making my way across the quad, the crisp autumn air of my sophomore year filled with the chatter and laughter of students back from fall break. While Gabe and I managed to see each other a few times, now that we were back on campus, we could be freer to be the couple we clearly had become. We still stayed in the shadows but the acreage was greater here in Lexington than it was back home in Shelbyville.

I was on my way to meet Gabe at his off-campus house. His roommate was away for the weekend and we had unfettered time to ourselves. I was running a little early but Gabe had given me a key to his place, surely a sign that he was ready to commit even deeper to me. I smiled as I crossed an intersection, only a few blocks from his house. Maybe I’d strip down naked and just wait in bed for him.

The one thing Gabe excelled at was getting me to release my inner sex goddess. I never knew physical intimacy could be so profound and yet liberating at the same time. He made me feel beautiful, no more so than when he was worshipping me in bed.

My head was in the stars when I reached his house so I didn’t really see Derek Mardraggon until I almost ran into him. He was coming down the porch steps, his cell phone pressed to his ear as he was talking to someone.

Derek was Gabe’s first cousin, second son to Terrance Mardraggon. He and Gabe weren’t overly close, but Derek was a freshman and Gabe had been helping him navigate first-year life at the University of Kentucky. I was so shocked to see him, and him me, that we came to a stop and just stared at each other.

My heart pounded as I realized this did not look good, me waltzing up to Gabe’s place as if I belonged there. While I wanted nothing more than for me and Gabe to tell the family, I knew that this was not the way to do it. Mind buzzing with potential excuses as to why I was here, it hit me that I was merely walking down the block. I wasn’t necessarily headed to Gabe’s place as far as Derek knew.

With that in mind, I continued walking down the sidewalk, intending to make a wide berth around where Derek stood at the bottom of Gabe’s steps. My eyes were on the ground, my shoulders hunched as I held tight to the pack on my back, hoping it would look like nothing more than a Blackburn wanting to avoid confrontation with a Mardraggon.

No such luck though, as Derek stepped into my path, bringing me up short. He wasn’t overly big, standing only a few inches taller than my five-seven height. But as I looked up at him, the smug superiority on his face made me feel about three inches tall.

“I knew I smelled something foul on the wind,” he said as his eyes ran up and down me in disgust.

I had to bite my tongue not to hurl back an insult. “I don’t have time for childish assholes.”

I tried to step around Derek but he moved quickly, blocking my exit. “Oh, don’t play so coy with me, Kat. I mean… you’re a Blackburn and all, but I could make an exception if you wanted to see what a real man was like.”

I almost gagged when he reached out and brushed hair back from my face. Once again, eyes ran down my body and this time, they weren’t mocking and cruel but held lewd intentions within their muddy brown depths.

His fingers trailed along my neck and the touch was so abhorrent that I scrambled away from him, coming up against a large oak tree in the corner of Gabe’s yard.

Derek was fast, moving to cage me in against the tree with one palm on the rough bark and the other tugging on a lock of my hair. “What do you say we go back to my place? It will be a step up for you and I’ve never been too proud to slum it.”

Enraged, my hands flew to his chest and I shoved him hard. “You’re a pig.”

“Hey,” I heard Gabe call out and my head turned to see him walking down the sidewalk, his eyes flicking back and forth between me and Derek. “What’s going on?”

Derek’s smile widened as he saw his cousin and moved his way, holding out his hand sideways. “What’s up, cuz? I just stopped by to see what you were doing this weekend.”

Gabe took the offered palm and they clasped hands, pulling each other into a quick bro hug. I took a few steps back, unsure of what to do or say. I should leave, therefore alleviating any risk that Derek might see something between Gabe and me.

But Derek was having too much fun playing. He jerked his thumb my way and sneered, “Found a Blackburn sullying your block.” His gaze moved to me, eyes glittering with malice and lust, a combination that made me furious and sick at the same time. “But she’s hot, right cousin? We could probably both take her out for a spin.”

I saw the fury and hatred blaze across Gabe’s face over Derek’s crude suggestion, and I thought to myself… Oh, wow… it’s all going to come out now.

Derek turned back toward Gabe, laughing at his suggestion, and I watched as the rage melted right off Gabe’s face and to my horror, he started laughing with Derek. “Seriously, dude… even I’m not willing to slum it with a Blackburn, no matter how hot she is.”

My heart shriveled up right there. Logically, I knew Gabe didn’t mean it and he was merely trying to hide his true feelings for me. But it was a betrayal because this wasn’t just about pretending we had nothing—it was his failure to stand up to someone attacking me.

---