Page 32 of White Rabbit

“Okay, that’s one thing sorted. What else is upsetting you?”

Covering my face with both hands, I whisper, “I think I’m obsessed with someone.”

“And that’s a problem because…”

“He’s dangerous.” That was an understatement. He was linked with the mafia, assumed second in command, responsible for a long list of crimes from murder to theft to arson, and yet none of them had been proven until this last assault. Chances were that this would somehow be overturned too.

Ro turns on her side to observe me. “Has he hurt you?”

I think about all our interactions. The infirmary has been the first time he’d even laid a finger on me. “No.”

She tilts her head as she takes another drag of her joint. “Would he hurt you?”

“No.” The word flies from my mouth, and I don’t know why I’m so sure about that answer. He was an inmate. A criminal. A savage beast—he’d even told me so himself.

“Meh.” She shrugs and lies on her back again. Blowing out a sickly smelling smoke plume, we both watch transfixed as it fades in the darkness. “I’m failing to see the issue here. It sounds like he’s more ‘burn the world down for you’ than your shitty ex who won’t even take your call.”

Burn the world? For me? No, that wasn’t right. There was always some sort of motivation or reason people got close to me. Even Chad had used my connections to help him with his career. I wasn’t worth burning the world for.

A masculine voice cuts through the quiet air. “Rosalyn! It’s time to go, love.”

“Oh, that’s me!” Ro sits up with a giggle, pushing to her feet. Stroking my hair, she says, “I’ll be seeing you soon, Le Fou.”

Chapter Seventeen

ELIJAH

Ikick my feet at the bunk above me with a growl. Beans has been snoring for the last hour and I’m just about ready to strangle the motherfucker. How can someone so small and scrawny be so fucking loud?

Unable to sleep, I login to the surveillance app and watch as Ava tosses and turns in her bed.

A few nights ago, I’d watched her dress for the Lutwidge charity dinner. She’d worn a soft peach colored gown that made her look ethereal. I’d hated watching her pace her apartment, trying to get hold of that waste of air, Chad. But I was glad he’d listened to my instructions. I would have hated for things to get bloody. My people were watching him closely, having followed him to the hole he’s crawled into like the snake he was.

Nicco had tailed her around over the weekend as she’d tried to get access to Chad’s apartment, spoken to his boss, and even called his mother. If I went missing, would she miss me?

No, not yet. But one day she would feel the same about me as I did her. I wanted to be her entire universe. This ‘little obsession’ as Chad had called it, had morphed into something much deeper. I’d had countless women and men over the years, but there was something about Ava Bishop, a feral instinct that made me want to both hunt her and keep her safe.

She’d come home from the gala, tipsy and grinning. Barely inside the door, she’d started stripping down to nothing but her thong and for the first time, I regretted staying in Ogmore. I wanted to be with her, buried inside her, kissing that beautiful skin, tasting the champagne on her tongue.

Thoughts of Bishop have me on edge as I replay the videos of her, restless as I’m torn about the two sides of her personality. She looks like butter wouldn’t melt, but melt she fucking did under my touch. In that instant, gone was the good little officer, daughter of a prominent judge, do-gooder and instead I saw a fellow apex predator. I watched the cogs turning in her head, like she was mapping out what would happen next. I saw raw hunger; the monster lurking beneath the surface, begging for freedom and how she shut it down. Ava stepped back and closed me out like it was nothing. I am not nothing. What we have is not nothing. That was unacceptable. Her monstrous side needed to be free.

I just hoped I didn’t push too hard and regret it afterwards. This was no longer something to keep me occupied while I was behind bars, or a way to ferret out who put me here. I wanted more. I wanted it all.

After finally getting a few hours’ sleep, I’m wide awake and ready for my first art workshop. I’d seen Bishop on Tuesday, but she’d been absent from the communal areas and cell block F. Obviously, I’d been watching her via the cameras in her living room and bedroom and Cato still made sure I received the footage from across the street but it wasn't the same as seeing her in person.

“I still can’t believe you got enrolled on the course,” Beans grumbles at breakfast, while we eat our cold toast and lumpy oats. He scrunches up his nose, making a frustrated noise, and I grin.

“Did ya expect anything less?” Papa T scoffs, as he pushes the lumps in his fruit cup with his spoon. I still hadn’t gotten a decent read on the man, but Cato had looked into him for me. Papa T was a gun for hire, a big bad mercenary. He had no allegiances, and so as long as he stayed out of my way, I’d stay out of his.

“I have plenty of fight left in me if you’d like me to take out another Cartel member.” I chuckle, glancing across the chow hall where Tiny’s gang mates are glaring at me. “Although, I think they’re more wary of me now.”

Beans gags, making a retching noise. “Nah, I’m good. I thought I was going to barf when you sliced Tiny’s face like he was Spam.”

“Should have stayed put then.” I scold. There had been so much blood, and with the adrenaline rushing around my system, I hadn’t realized Beans had come back into the shower and watched in horror as I’d cut the Cartel member. “If you’d listened to me…”

“Yeah, yeah.” He waves his hand, indicating for me to stop. “Well, I will next time.”

Entering the classroom ready for the workshop, I choose a seat towards the back nestled in a space between the window and the supply closet. Ava does her best to avoid glancing at me as the other inmates enter, but I can tell that she’s struggling. She’s wearing a blue officer blouse, and a black high waisted skirt today with flat black shoes. Her whole body is tense as she stands at the front of the room, leaning against her desk with her hands clasped together.

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