Page 19 of Intertwined Souls

His lips barely tilt up. “I’m fine. Still tired, but fine. Are you alright?” He raises a brow.

How I am doesn’t matter right now. It’s Cade who had the worst scare out of all of us. A bullshit answer forms in my mind. “I—”

“Before you answer that,” Grayson says as he plops down next to me, taking my hand, while Ryker sits on the coffee table in front of me. “Remember that we are all in this together. So however you feel, whatever is going through your head, tell us. Let us help you navigate it.”

He looks up at Ryker and Cade, narrowing his eyes pointedly.

“The same goes for all of us. Communicate. No matter what the feelings or thoughts are. Honesty is the only way we make anything work.” Grayson locks eyes with Cade, both of them seeming to have a staredown before Cade finally gives a sharp nod and Grayson exhales.

Deciding to just get it over with and not keep overthinking, I squeeze Gray’s hand and then blurt out everything I was just thinking. All the questions, the worries, the fears. All of it comes pouring out until I’m gasping for breath.

“I don’t know how to do this,” I murmur afterwards, keeping my eyes trained on Grayson’s and I’s hands where he runs his thumb in circles over my skin.

“Harley,” Ryker says softly. I meet his dark brown determined eyes. “Do you want this? Do you want to truly try? Being with all three of us? We don’t know what we are doing either, and there’s already been bumps along the way. But you are the most important part. We need to know what you truly want.”

Blowing out a breath, I look at all of them. They each draw something different from me. They bring something different. I know I have feelings for all three of them, and as weird as it feels, only being with one of them would feel wrong.

“Yes. Yes, I want this. I—you all make me feel things in different ways, and it feels right, even when it seems weird and not right,” I whisper.

Ryker gives me a gorgeous smile and leans forward, capturing my lips with his. He pulls back all too soon but not before biting down on my lower lip, causing me to gasp. “Good. It would’ve really sucked to let you know I wasn’t going to give up and just let you go.”

“I feel like you aren’t kidding,” I say, but he just shrugs and sits back. “You all want this, though? Like really? Sharing me? That feels… selfish.” I grimace.

“It’s not selfish. Not in the slightest. First off, this has been a long time coming because of Ryker,” Grayson explains. “He was obsessed with you, honestly. He probably wasn’t very far off from kidnapping you and bringing you here before you ran off.” His lips quirk in amusement. “And secondly, you help all of us in different ways, too. I promise, it’s not selfish. And as for me, I want you. I want you so badly I feel like a piece of me is missing when I’m not with you. I know I don’t show it as easily as Ry does, but it’s there.”

Cade nods. “I maybe said a few words every six months before we met you. Now, well, now I want to talk. But not to everyone. I want to talk to you. And I feel better talking around the guys. I want you with every fiber of my being. Even if it means sharing you with these two. I’m willing to learn how we do this. I didn’t see what they saw before, but I do now. And I'm not letting it go.”

He stands up and walks over to me, gripping my chin in an unrelenting hold and tilting my head up to meet his lips. Cade’s kiss is hard and demanding; he takes full control, and I’m willing to give it to him.

When he pulls away, I try to follow, not even realizing it. He smirks and gently presses his lips to my forehead. “Later,” he murmurs.

“I’ve been obsessed with you since you walked into the piano classroom. It only grew with every second I was in your presence. You’re stuck with me.” Ry grins.

“There’s just…” I pinch my lips together, hesitating.

I’m unsure of whether I truly want the answer to what I need to ask them, but it’s something that’s been bothering me. Since I burned a man alive.

“I killed someone a few days ago.” I keep my eyes trained on the ground. “I killed someone, and I felt no guilt, no remorse, no regret. I, well, I enjoyed it. And I can’t even find it in me to be upset by that. He deserved far worse than what he even got. But I’m damaged. There’s something wrong with me for having enjoyed bringing harm to someone and then watching a building burn knowing they were inside and feeling nothing but triumph and relief.” I look up at each of them. “I’m fucked up. Why would you want that?”

Ryker shrugs. “I killed my dad, babe. I don’t feel bad about it. Hell, I would love to go back and have dragged it out for hours or days. I think about harming others, I have a tendency to let my anger consume me, and I have literally beat people close to death. I love getting my hands dirty, fighting, shooting, watching someone who deserves to die, die. I’m fucked up, too. It’s why we’re a perfect match.”

“I would kill my father. If he got out of prison right now and showed up, I’d give him the same treatment he made me give others,” Cade seethes. “And I would love it. I’m tainted. Scarred, a little broken. I’ve killed and hurt people. Yes, I was forced to do it, but some dark, twisted part of me enjoyed it. The ones that I knew did wrong or harmed innocent people, I enjoyed hurting them. We are all fucked up in different ways. We aren’t normal, but fuck normal.”

“I can’t really say the same things as them,” Grayson starts slowly, “but I have darkness inside me. I think it began after I lost my brother and things just shifted and changed. I spent more time here and around these guys. I’ve learned how to protect myself; I see ways that we can help people, and I want to. It didn’t bother me to see those crappy men get killed, and it didn’t turn me off finding out what you did to David. I thought it was kind of hot that you got the revenge you desperately wanted. You let nothing stop you. I want that for you. I want to help all of you with your demons.”

Wiping a stray tear off my cheek, I smile. “Okay, I understand. I mean, I think it’ll take time for me to truly trust it, us, all of this. But I want to try. With all of you.”

“It’ll take us all time, baby girl. It won’t be easy. It hasn’t been easy.” Ryker scoffs at Cade’s words. “But it’ll be worth it.”

“Now, how about we go spend some time decompressing and having some fun like we are supposed to be doing, girlfriend?” Ryker purrs the last word, and I giggle as he pulls me off the couch and starts walking towards the back door. “Come on, brother boyfriends, let's go,” he calls over his shoulder to the other two.

“They seem to be getting along with everyone really well,” I say, plopping down next to Bri at one of the picnic tables they have set up in the yard. Gabriel, Colton, Atlas, Lincoln, Ryan, and a few others are all up on the patio chatting away around the grill.

She nods. “This is their kind of environment. They have always loved the idea of being part of a club, but because of other things in Virginia, they haven't been able to join one over there. But I think they are finding a place here.” She smiles softly, watching them before bumping my shoulder with her own. “You have, too. I’ve loved seeing you smile so much today. It’s a nice change.”

Resting my head on her shoulder, my eyes roam around to everyone here. We all ate way too much food when the guys and I came back from Gabriel's house. It’s been peaceful and calm in a way that I haven’t felt in years.

Brielle’s house was always calm, sure, but there was always this intense underlying tension. Here, even with everything we have looming over our heads, I feel a sense of peace right now in this moment.

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