Page 72 of A Forever Kind of Rancher

To live in a world, a broken, pain-filled world, and be able to want love, no matter the cost.

Suddenly it was like all the walls were gone. Torn down. Suddenly it was like he could see clearly.

This was life.

And it did matter what he wanted. What he wanted might hurt him. Might kill them.

But he wanted it all the same. And actually, maybe he would be the rodeo commissioner. Maybe not. He realized that none of it had mattered because all he really wanted this whole time was Wendy.

So he was going to have to win her back.

Wendy was just getting out of the car with the girls when Boone pulled up to the cottage in his truck.

“Wendy,” he said, looking wild-eyed. “I love you.”

She blinked. “Okay.”

“I love you and I want to be with you. Fuck everything else. Sorry. Screw everything else.”

The girls exchanged a look.

“Boone...”

“I love you.” And then he pulled her into his arms and kissed her. Then she lost herself a little bit, it was impossible not to.

“Boone,” she said, looking at Mikey and Sadie, who were staring at them both.

“Sorry,” he said. “I’m sorry, and there’s another part of this conversation,” he said. “And it includes the two of you.”

She had just been talking to the girls about how she’d seen Daniel, and how he wanted to see them. This was all very inconvenient timing.

But it was life. And it was happening. A lot of feelings, a lot of un-ideal sorts of moments clashing with each other.

“I’m not trying to take your dad’s spot, because he’s your dad. But I’ve known you since you were born, and I care about you. And I love your mom. And I’d be happy if you were all right with that.”

“Everything is changing,” Mikey said sadly.

“I know,” said Boone. “And I don’t like it, either, quite frankly. I just about messed everything up so I could keep some things the same. Because nobody likes change. I can’t say that I’ve been happy all these years by myself. But it seemed pretty safe. And I was happy with that. So when your mom said she wanted to be with me, I said no. But I realized that I’m more afraid of not having her in my life. More afraid of not sharing a house with all three of you. More afraid of what the future looks like if you’re not my family. I want you to be.” He cleared his throat. “I... I have hope, Mikey. Even if I’m not certain. And I’m tired of living without hope.”

And it was like Mikey realized for the first time that adults had feelings. Feelings and fears and all of this scared them too.

“Oh.”

“I care about both you girls a lot,” he reiterated, his voice hoarse. “I care about whether or not you’re happy.”

“I want my mom to be happy,” Sadie said. “And you should be happy too.”

“We should be happy,” Boone said, looking at Wendy.

“Boone,” she said, wrapping her arms around him and just hugging him. Because the connection between them had been more than sex. And she wanted to show him that now.

And also not make out with him in front of her kids. Because they were asking a whole lot of the girls, and she didn’t need to traumatize them on top of it.

“What changed?” she asked.

“I accepted that there was always going to be some level of risk. I accepted that I had to let love be bigger than my fear. And you know what? I just don’t feel afraid anymore.”

And neither did she. Because the love inside of her was too big for that.

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