Page 108 of A Forever Kind of Rancher

“Go on now,” she said, standing back and waiting for him to start walking toward the bathroom.

She followed him and took in the view, then waited while he turned the shower on and let it warm up. She stepped inside, and he stayed out, watching her as she washed away the evidence of their passion.

“What?” she asked. “Get in here!”

“I like the view.”

“Well, I want to touch.”

He stepped into the shower and pushed her against the wall, the motion swift and decisive, his kiss hard. She gripped the back of his neck and held him to her, kissing him back with everything in her. All the emotion. All the need. All the everything that she hadn’t been wanting or expecting. It didn’t matter what she wanted, she realized suddenly.

It was there all the same.

Wanting anything other than sex with Zack Camden was a recipe for disaster. It made no sense. He didn’t want anything more than sex, and even if he did, they would still live a broad expanse of country away from each other.

So there was no reason for her to say the words that were pounding through her head. No reason at all for her to feel them or think them. And really, really, really no reason to say them.

But he was so perfect against her, so hot and hard and slick.

She put her hand on his chest, and she could feel his heart beating. And she couldn’t hold it back, not anymore.

“I’m in love with you, Zack,” she said, the words torn from her on a sob, the force of them shaking her. She hadn’t expected them, but she knew the moment they left her mouth that they were true. That this was what the burning, brilliant sensation that had been building inside of her over the past week meant.

Because she loved the person he was making her become.

Because she loved his strength, his talent. Because his pain had broken her and his smile lit something inside her on fire.

Because he made her want something more, when nothing and no one else ever had.

He froze, then pulled away from her. “Grace, don’t,” he said, his voice hard.

“Sorry. No...you know what? I’m not sorry,” she said, pushing away from the wall, the water washing over her body. “Because I didn’t say that for you. I said it for me. And it has nothing to do with what you expected, or what I expected, or what makes sense. Or what might be considered good. It’s just...true. And it’s not for anyone but me. Not to make up for anything or to atone for someone else’s sins, this is...this is what I feel. I’ve fallen in love with you, and I well know what that feels like, Zack.”

“How? After a week? Do you know how stupid that sounds?” he asked, shoving the shower door open and getting out, tugging a white towel off the rack.

“I’m never stupid,” she said. “I’m a lot of things. I’m a prude—well, maybe not now, but ask my friends, I always have been. I’m cautious. I’m a people pleaser. I work so hard to please my parents, to be everything Hannah isn’t and achieve some vague idea of success that I don’t even know what I want anymore. So yeah, I’m a lot of things, but stupid isn’t one of them.”

“I didn’t say you were stupid, I said... I said you can’t... Grace, you can’t possibly love me.”

“Why?”

“Because,” he said, turning sharply to face her, “I can’t love you.”

“What you can and can’t do has nothing to do with me,” she said, trying to ignore the stab of pain in her chest. “It has nothing to do with what I feel.”

“So I don’t have any choice in the matter?”

“No. I’m in love with you. End of discussion. I didn’t ask for anything—” she shut the water off and stepped out “—and I won’t. But I love you. I’ve lived with a man, slept with him, shared closet space and a toothbrush cup with him, and it wasn’t this. It wasn’t like he’d taken up residence in my chest. I know that you can be with someone for a long time and not feel this. That time has nothing to do with it, that...sense has nothing to do with it. If reason had a part to play in love... I would have loved damn David. But I didn’t. I love you, you jerk.”

“I can’t,” he said, his words broken. He crossed the room and cupped her face his hold tight, his eyes intense on hers. “I just think... It’s like my whole chest is scooped out, Grace. I can’t give you more than this. I can’t give you what a man should give you when you say things like that to him. I’m like... I’m just like one of my statues. A bad one. One that doesn’t feel anything or mean anything.”

“Your statue isn’t bad,” she said. “It’s just not finished. What do you need to be finished, Zack? How can I make you whole?”

“I don’t know,” he said, his hold tightening. “I think I might be dead inside.”

She put her hands on his face. “I wish I could figure out how to make you live.”

“Just touch me,” he said, his voice rough.

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