Page 61 of Offside Devil

I nod. Unfortunately.

It was Mira’s idea to come to the game. Actually, I have Taylor to thank. Mira swore they’d sit in discreet seats, which I guess means they’ll steer clear of the boxes.

Still, as soon as Mira brought it up, I wanted to say no. I’ve been distracted enough recently without planting my secret son and fake girlfriend in the stands.

Then Mira hit me with “Aiden would really enjoy seeing what you do for work.” After that, I don’t know what the fuck happened.

Suddenly, I wanted Aiden to be there.

I wanted him to see me playing.

I wanted to impress my boy.

If I could ask Jace anything, it would be that. Is this normal? Will Aiden always take up so much of my brain space? Is this just an adjustment period and I’ll eventually get used to feeling like one of my vital organs exists outside of my body?

Or is this just how my life looks from now on?

What I find out for sure is that I don’t get used to it in the next sixty minutes. Every missed goal and intercepted pass are proof of that.

“You’re losing your touch, Whitaker,” Carson taunts. I just took a wide shot at the goal and Carson cleaned up my mess. Again.

I’m too busy scanning the stands for any sign of Aiden and Mira to bother with a response.

Where the fuck are they?

The owner’s box is empty, thank God. Then again, the stands can get rowdy. Not so much in preseason, but the arena is still full of hardcore fans guzzling beers in special edition, thirty-two ounce cups. I never should have let Mira talk me into this.

Aiden shouldn’t be here.

What if someone takes a picture of him? What if they figure out he’s my kid?

Mira promised me she would have Taylor get a ticket for Evan, too. But if that’s true, where in the hell is he? Evan is twice the size of a normal human. He should stick out in the crowd, for fuck’s sake!

I twist in a circle, scanning every painted face in a sea of red and white, when someone grabs me by the back of my jersey.

I instinctively swing my elbow back. Jace dodges out of the way just in time to avoid taking it to the chin. “What the fuck, Whitaker? What are you doing?”

“What are you doing?” I bark. “Get off of me.”

“I’m playing hockey, which is what you should be doing!” He gets in my face. “I don’t know what the fuck is up with you lately, Z, but figure it the fuck out.”

I feel our teammates watching us. Coach, too. I’ve never felt further from becoming captain.

But I don’t care. The only thing I care about is knowing that Aiden is safe.

I twist away from Jace, but he circles around and ends up in front of me again. His expression is softer, his voice low enough that I can barely hear it over the din of the crowd. “I don’t know what is going on in your head right now, but you need to remember why you’re out here. This is your dream, man. Remember why you want this.”

A couple weeks ago, it would’ve been a great pep talk.

Tonight, it opens the door to something dangerous.

All I’ve wanted for years is to be on this team. To be a great leader. To give the Angels all I have. Now, I want to be in the stands with Mira and my son just as much.

Hell… maybe more.

26

ZANE

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